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such a nasty woman | by maryann johanson

daily list: 5 better Thomas Magnums than Matthew McConaughey

Ah, I see that the creative collapse of Hollywood continues with yet another ripoff from TV: we’re getting a Magnum P.I. movie, and it’s going to star Matthew McConaughey. Ugh. Worse, it’s coming from Rawson Thurber, the writer-director of Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story. Have these guys even seen the classic 80s TV show? Who decided that the new-millennium equivalent of “charming and frothy and fun” is “smarmy and juvenile and idiotic”?

Almost anyone would be better than Thurber, and almost anyone would be better than McConaughey in the starring role. Such as:
1. Josh Holloway. We know him now as the magnetic conman Sawyer on Lost, but can’t you see him putting that bad-boy allure to good use as a crime-fighting ladies man? We already know he looks great on the beach…

2. Russell Crowe. The Magnum move could go all intense and grim — like Michael Mann’s Miami Vice update — with the likes of Crowe in the driver’s seat of Robin Masters’ Ferrari.

3. Connor Trinneer. You don’t know who is he, because he’s the most criminally underused actor on television. But if you saw him steal Star Trek: Enterprise from Scott Bakula, then you know what I’m talking about. He’s got all-American charisma with a dangerous edge — just like Magnum — and can do laid-back that doesn’t make you think “brain-dead.”

4. Will Smith. Magnum was a regular guy, but in a grownup way that the likes of overgrown fratboy McConaughey can’t hope to match. Who’s our new everyman for the 21st century? Of course it’s Will Smith. Which means that the new TC, Magnum’s sidekick, could be played by a goofy white guy. It could even be McConaughey.

5. Tom Selleck. Hey, if Harrison Ford can pick up Indiana Jones’s fedora and bullwhip after 25 years, why can Selleck put on the Hawaiian shirt again? It’d be fun to catch up with what Magnum’s been up to in recent years.

Oh, and Higgins? Must be played by Ewan McGregor.

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  • How about Josh Brolin? The man can rock a mustache like nobody since… well, since Tom Selleck!

  • MaryAnn

    Yeah, Brolin’s been good lately, but he doesn’t have that Selleck charisma.

  • I so agree about Connor..he is an awesome actor..He has play great lawyer in Close to Home’s episode Privilege, an interesting bad guy in NCIS episode Jeopardy, on Enterprise he was rock awesome southerner boy warp core engineer and now he is currently the coolest, misunderstood, some what bad guy (half wraith)on Stargate Atlantis..Yea, I think he would blow people’s minds if he played a role like Magnum

  • Mary

    You couldn’t be more right about Connor. It is sinful that he hasn’t been cast in a series or a top-budget film. What the heck is wrong with TPTB in Hollywood? He is a terrific actor with truly amazing screen presence!!

  • Ana

    Thomas Magnum was my hero when I was a teen.
    I hate to imagine McConaughey in this role.
    I totally agree with Josh Holloway or Will Smith in this role!
    But I would like much, much more to see Tom Selleck as Magnum today! Everybody gets old , even our heroes!
    For me Selleck is still the best!

  • Rox

    Puhleez – McConaughey as Magnum?!!! Oh, blech. Magnum was my hero and I was able to meet TS a few times. I’m all for Tom reprising his role just like Harrison Ford and Indiana Jones. Only Tom can pull it off and he still looks great! Yeah, let’s have a Magnum movie but please give the casting more thought than putting caveman Matt in the title slot. What a turnoff! Why not the dude from
    “The Shield” and “Moonlight” – Alex O’Loughlin?

  • action kate

    another vote for connor! “criminally underused” is exactly right. the man has range, flexibility, skill, and charisma to burn. he makes everyone he interacts with vastly better. and the people who have worked with him universally adore him. please, get this man a series!

  • CBN the Connor fan

    And yet ANOTHER vote for Connor! Ditto everything posted by action kate above.

    Get this man a series PLEASE!

  • MaryAnn

    Clearly, I’ve tapped into secret underground Connor Trinneer fan adoration. :->

  • Mary

    SECRET underground Connor Trinneer fan adoration?!
    you need to get out more, hon.
    wewantbrunettejolene.com (even there, Connor has his own forum!)

    He fills the house when he appears at conventions and his forums are SRO.

  • MaryAnn

    In the grand scheme of things, I’m afraid it is underground, Mary. No insult to Trinneer — clearly, I think he’s awesome…

  • Ryan

    Ok, just two comments here:

    First, I could not agree more…McConaughey couldn’t act his way out of a parking ticket, I’d take any of the five actors you listed, plust 10 more I can think of off the top of my head over him. (Holloway has my vote from your list)

    Second, I also think that Connor Trineer is an excellent actor…but stealing ‘Enterprise’ from Scott Bakula is sort of damning him with faint praise. I think most of the extras in that show stole their scenes with Scott Bakula. His take on Captain Archer was the most wooden acting performance I have witnessed since seeing The Black Pearl in Pirates of the Caribbean.

  • MaryAnn

    Yes, Bakula was wooden in *Enterprise,* but that was a pretty shocking departure from everything else he’s ever done, at least that I’ve seen.

    I don’t mean to damn Trinneer with faint praise. He’s the only cast member who made *Enterprise* a must-see for me, and his performance as “Michael,” the Wraith turned human in *Stargate Atlantis,* made me see that perhaps this show is not a completely lost cause.

  • CBN the Connor fan

    I hadn’t watched Trek in years until I stumbled upon it one night….and the episode happened to be one that featured Connor’s character Trip Tucker. I was fascinated and quickly became a fan. I can’t say how much I enjoy his work as Michael on Stargate Atlantis also!

    Thanks, Mary Ann, for including him on your list! It’s always fun to find more Trinneer fans.

  • Mary Ann I also want to thank you for noticing the great talent that Connor Trinneer has..To bad more people do not recognize it..I think it is great that he is has recurring guest character(Michael) on Atlantis and I can’t wait to see this new movie he is suppose to be having a lead role in (Termination Shock), but I would love to see him on much more

  • Margie Torres

    I agree that Connor Trinneer would make the best Magnum P.I. His character Trip on Enterprise had great southern charm with “a dangerous edge” and was very laid back. He was also extremely funny! I wish we could see more of him in movies/series. Connor is truly a gifted actor!

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