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such a nasty woman | by maryann johanson

daily list: 4 things that ‘Made of Honor’ might possibly mean

I’m trying not to think about Made of Honor now that I’ve seen it and reviewed it and can put it behind me, but it’s kinda like when you’re kid and you have a loose tooth and your mother tells you to leave it alone but you just can’t help it, you simply have to tongue it and fiddle with it and not leave it alone at all until it falls out before it was really ready to and then you bleed all over your favorite Luke Skywalker T-shirt.

Cuz I’m wondering: just what the hell does that title mean? (And I’m not the only one wondering this.) I mean, before I saw the movie, I figured, Well, obviously, Patrick Dempsey’s character is going to be so full of honorable intentions and so dedicated to respecting the wishes of his best friend in the whole world that even after he realizes he’s in love with her on the eve of her wedding, he will do the noble and, yes, honorable thing and be an official witness to her nuptials like a grownup, all the while keeping his damn fool mouth shut about what he wants and going out of his way not to ruin her wedding day at all.

Riiiight. I had apparently forgotten for one glorious moment that Hollywood does not make movies for or about grownups. Of course there’s very little honorable about Dempsey’s character at all. So where did that title come from?
1. It was a typo. It was actually supposed to be Made of Horror, to clue audiences in to the fact that the flick is a nightmare of terrifying slapstick and scarily unfunny jokes about the lovely people and culture of Scotland, but the advertising exec who wrote the title down first got only 300 on his verbal SATs, and everyone was too afraid to point out his error.

2. It’s a reference to bridge, that hot card game that absolutely everyone is playing. You know, like how you get honors for holding high-value cards. Because Michelle Monaghan is a queen — a high-value card — and Dempsey is determined to score with her.

3. Duh: Honor Blackman, former Bond girl and badass Avengers chick, was originally going to appear as the mother of Monaghan’s Scottish fiancé. There was going to be a whole big subplot about how she is secretly a member of the British mafia and would attempt to divert Dempsey from his quest to ruin Monaghan’s wedding by inducting him into her gang: and then he’d be “made.” See? By the time that subplot had been written out and Blackman uncast, the posters had been printed and it was too late to change anything.

4. It doesn’t mean anything at all, and is nothing but a deliberate attempt by Hollywood to make you crazy thinking about and talking about a stupid movie that is best forgotten. Bastards.

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