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such a nasty woman | by maryann johanson

the oh-no! DVD of the week: ‘Champions of Faith: Baseball Edition’

Because Jesus always hates the other team, and makes them fumble.

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  • Bill

    “Champions of Faith”? This is the best they can do? I mean, Jesus and baseball. I’m not a “reader”, but I’m sure someone has written an elegant phrase or two about at least one of these topics. At first glance, one wonders if this is actually a parody of the relationship between religion and sports. That’s a dvd that I might buy.

  • amanohyo

    Some stickler for terminology is going to say this sooner or later, it might as well be me. Jesus makes the other team fumble in football; in baseball, he makes the other team commit errors… unless he loves them more than he loves you. At least he doesn’t smite the other team like his dad used to do.

    Besides baseball, Jesus also enjoys being praised loudly, the consumption of crackers, and seeing a pendant symbolizing the most painful part of his life hanging around your neck… oh, and large, expensive buildings… and nice clothes… and money of course, but really has there ever been a deity who didn’t love money? You can’t possibly hold that against him, how else is he supposed to know we’re praising him? He’s not a mindreader. How else would those ignorant of his glory see how awesome he is, and how awesome we are for believing in his awesomeness?

  • Hdj

    you cant fumble a baseball MJ , you can boot it, you can bobble it ,or commit an error. Fumbling is football as in American Football. I can’t really blame you for your mistake, since your such a limey wannabe you probably don’t know the difference between cricket and the MLB.

  • MaryAnn

    Jesus makes the other team fumble in football; in baseball, he makes the other team commit errors…

    Oh, I hope to Christ you guys are trying to be funny. Just like I was trying to be funny.

    “Jesus made me commit an error” just ain’t damn near as hilarious as “Jesus made me fumble.”

  • Bill

    fumble: 3. to make, handle, etc., clumsily or inefficiently

    For what it’s worth, I believe a baseball player can fumble the ball, fumble a play, etc.

  • Hdj

    believe what you want, they never say fumble doing baseball

  • Bill

    I certainly don’t mean to be antagonistic, but I have heard the word ‘fumble’ used in reference to the botching of a double play, dropped fly balls, etc. It may be that in football a fumble is a particular event, narrowly defined within the rules of the game, but my point is that that doesn’t give football a monopoly on the use of the word.

  • Hdj

    yeah it does ,you hear Fumble over and over in NFL.
    In baseball, if they drop it or catch it and it pops out, that called booting it. If a player charges the catcher and the catcher loses the ball, thats still not a fumble, its called Safe. If by some chance the announcer said fumble, then he made the fumble because he should know that when you say fumble, you aren’t talking baseball.
    Todays the All star game, in the last year of the original Yankee stadium , and I guarantee you will not hear them say fumble a single time during the entire game.

  • I prefer George Carlin’s phrase: “Jesus made me drop the ball.” It works for almost any sport!

    Also, we’re all going to hell for participating in this thread.

  • Bill

    Once again, the insight of George Carlin brings light where there was only darkness. I hereby yield to Hdj in the “fumble” debate.

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