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since 1997 | by maryann johanson

August is a red-light district

Yes, The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor and Swing Vote — the two movies opening wide today — both get a red light from me.

Welcome to August, traditionally the worst movie month of the year. And who wants to mess with tradition?



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  • Bill

    Are you kidding me? Bubble Boy AND Pauly Shore’s In the Army Now came out in August, says the interweb. We are clearly in the month of timeless classics.

    But The Sixth Sense and The 13th Warrior were August releases, as well. So maybe there’s hope for surprise gem.

  • Hmm. August wide releases:

    This week:
    The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor: bad
    Swing Vote: eh
    The Midnight Meat Train: could be OK, don’t expect much

    8/8 (the Olympics start):
    Pineapple Express: bad (and I expect MaryAnn will SHRED this one)
    The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2: bad

    8/15:
    Star Wars: The Clone Wars: bad
    Tropic Thunder: looks good… putting this movie in this weekend might be brilliant from the perspective of being a diamond in the rough
    Mirrors: looks like it could be OK
    Vicky Christina Barcelona: not even sure what this is

    8/22:
    Death Race: could be OK in a cheesy Escape from New York / Doomsday / Mad Max kinda way
    The House Bunny: looks bad
    The Longshots (directed by Fred Durst… yes, that Fred Durst): you have to ask?
    The Rocker: might be OK

    8/29:
    Disaster Movie: oh, HELL no
    Babylon AD: doesn’t look too promising
    Traitor: might be good (Don Cheadle stars in this one)
    College: don’t know anything about it

    Tropic Thunder is probably my only “probably going to see it” in this list.

  • Hdj

    I got my summer cut out for me, clone wars, Death race 2000, Babylon A.D the new Vin Diesel movie no ones talking about, for some reason, no love for Vinny D i guess. No one can seem to forgive him for movies like Fast and the furious (which I didn’t see, not much of a car guy ,I’d drive a station wagon if i had to) and XXX (Which I did see only because of Asia Argento). Theres a chance I’ll try to see, Tropic Thunder, depending on the reviews here and other places.

  • MaryAnn

    *Tropic Thunder* is hilarious. Definitely a must-see.

    *Midnight Meat Train* is not a wide release — it’s at only 102 theaters, none of them in NYC, which is a bad sign.

    *Vicky* is a Woody Allen movie, so could be good, could be bad…

  • Bill

    Vicky Christina Barcelona could be really good. I think it’s Woody Allen. Javier Bardem, Penelope Cruz – there is potential here.

  • FrankS

    Baghead just opened here in the Chicago area. I heard it got some positive reviews at Sundance, so I’m heading out to see it later today.

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