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such a nasty woman | by maryann johanson

trailer break: ‘Seven Pounds’

Take a break from work: watch a movie trailer…

Huh. That was so not was I was expecting. Seven Pounds? I figured: gotta be a baby, right? Gonna be the feel-good romantic family bighearted flick of the holiday season! Forget all those Nazis and coldblooded vampires and steely secret agents and come cuddle a baby for Christmas!

Apparently not.

But now I’m genuinely intrigued. Of course, it’s clear from the thick gooey slather of sappiness the trailer is spreading all over itself that this will, indeed, be the Feel Good(TM) movie of the holiday season. (A blind man is always your go-to cliché for making us all feel better about the world. After all, if a blind person can be happy, what do we sighted people have to complain about? Oh, of course he’ll be crotchety in the beginning, but by the time Will Smith is done with him, he’ll be right as rain. Still blind — or maybe not? — but right as rain.) But what, exactly, will be the medium the sappiness uses to propagate itself, if not a baby?

What weighs seven pounds? The human heart? No. The human brain? No. The human head? Well, yes, but this seems unlikely to turn into a horror movie, though that would be interesting if, say, Will Smith turned out to be some sort of alien or cyborg who let seven strangers take it in turn to borrow his head and, I dunno, save themselves through the awesome megawatt power of his smile.

Wait a sec… Seven strangers? Seven? Maybe they each get a pound of something. Okay, yeah, now I get it. I bet the working title was The Merchant of Venice Beach

Seven Pounds opens wide in the U.S. on December 19; opens in the U.K. on January 16, 2009.

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  • James

    Coincidentally enough, £7 is the cost of an adult cinema ticket where I live at the moment.

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