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such a nasty woman | by maryann johanson

trailer break: ‘Twilight’

Take a break from work: watch a movie trailer…

I featured the teaser trailer for Twilight this summer, back before I had any idea what the hell this thing was that all the kids were into, and back when the release date was still December 12. Now, little girls are rioting over the movie and its star, Robert Pattinson, advance ticket sales are doing gangbusters, and trying to squeeze screening info out of press people? You’d think I was asking for a ticket to the Obama inauguration.

This official trailer makes a little more optimistic about the film: at least it appears to have a story beyond the teen-romance stuff. I’m sure all the little girls would be delighted with a cutest-vampire-boyfriend-ever tale, but I need a little more than that if I’m gonna enjoy it. Pattinson was awfully cute as Cedric Diggory in Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, but I’m not that into the mopey bloodsucking immortal thing. Get a little sun, dude. Oh, right…

Twilight opens wide in the U.S. on November 21, and in the U.K. on December 19.

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  • Alli

    Oh he can go in the sun. He just sparkles.

  • nina

    I thought he was cute as cedric diggory too. I never read the book but was like “yay, finally a cute boy at hogwarts to offset all those ginger kid Weasleys!” But then he died, but it all worked out. He was ressurected as a hot vampire.

    I read twilight–not the rest of the series. It’s no Toni Morrison novel, but for youth literature, it’s quite dishy and has an element of wit and humor to it that I appreciated. If the movie is as faithful to the material as they say, with an extra dose of action, it should make for a fun holiday movie.

  • John

    Isn’t Edward Cullen, essentially, a stalker? Granted, a sparkly one, but he broke into this girl’s house and watched her sleep. How is that not creepy as hell?

  • Alli

    John, I completely agree. I’m not sure why people over look that part. I guess they find it romantic because Bella does. Creepy.

  • lola

    It’s a gothic romance essentially people, with a touch of dark humor to make it less dated. I somehow survived the codependent freaks of Romeo and Juliet and Wuthering Heights unscathed as a teenager,so a vampire lab partner who watches you in your sleep? Eh, he’s am amateur!

  • John

    OK, then how about the fact that he’s what, 117 years old, but still hangs out in high schools? It’s almost Nabokovian, only Humbert wasn’t ultra-gorgeous. Sorry, lola, still getting the super-creepy stalker vibe.

  • lola

    Hardly Nabokovian.

    The premise is that he’s a vampire that was frozen at the age of 17. That’s the big sell for all the vamps–that whatever age and life situation they turn, that matters in terms of how they experience their vamp existence.

    He’s been reliving 17 for almost a century basically. He has experience beyond 17 sure, but it’s limited experiences(he plays the youngest of the vamp family that tries to live among humans, so the kid ends up stuck in high school wherever they move to) and it’s also limited in terms of his psychic development.

    The big deal in the book is that he’s been stuck for so long in at this stage of development, going through the motions but not actually living, that it’s a huge deal for him to move forward in the relationship with Bella. He’s basically a really stunted 17 year old in many ways.

  • MaryAnn

    How awful to be stuck in high school forever. Ugh.

    “yay, finally a cute boy at hogwarts to offset all those ginger kid Weasleys!”

    What, ginger people can’t be cute? Sheesh.

  • Alli

    That fact that he’s been 17 for 100 years never bothered me. I have a million issues with that book, but that’s not one of them.

  • nina

    aw, ginger kids can be super cute. Prince Harry is hot ginger. So is Edward Cullen in Twilight.lol But it’s the particular brand of ginger Weasley that doesn’t it doe it for me.

  • John

    Odd, I posted a response from my mobile earlier today, but it doesn’t seem to have shown up. *shrug*

    Roughly what I said:

    OK, I did not know about the lack of mental development beyond the age of 17 aspect. I withdraw my earlier statement. I admit I was wrong with the Lolita comparison.

    But I still don’t get why breaking in to her house and watching her sleep is acceptable.

  • MaryAnn

    Because the vampire is supercute, okay? Guys can do anything as long as they’re supercute!

    Haven’t movies taught you anything?

  • MaSch

    “Because the vampire is supercute, okay? Guys can do anything as long as they’re supercute!

    Haven’t movies taught you anything?”

    Gals also can do anything as long as they are supercute … I really do think that a cute female vampire breaking into a boys sleeping room to watch him sleep would get at least as much of an “awwwwwww” as the gender-switched situation gets.

  • MaryAnn

    I was thinking of the very wise Onion article that told of the man who was arrested for engaging in romantic-comedy-style behavior. The stuff men get away with in stupid romantic comedy movies — or in fantasy supercute-vampire-boyfriend movies — in no way constitutes an endorsement of what real men can expect to get away with in the real world.

  • Sivi

    I never before felt the need to make a comment on any of your reviews, I enjoy them greatly and agree most of the time.

    But right now looking at the “This official trailer makes a little more optimistic about the film: at least it appears to have a story beyond the teen-romance stuff.” line makes me sad.

    Seriously, I read the four books and I can tell you. Faithfull movie or not…it’s got no story beyond the teen-romance stuff.

    Even if I do believe Robert Pattinson to be cute I can’t see anything good possibly coming from this movie.

    Die hard fans are going to be outraged, so-and-so fans will think it was fine, everyone else will not give it any credit.

    At least that’s wht I think so I wouldn’t get my hopes up. And I am saying this without any hatred you see, I read the books, I loved ONE of the characters (and it WASN’T Edward, who is creepy)and jet am not looking forward to another book or to this movie, thats it. I have better tastes than that

    Ps:Even if I seem a little bit too uptight about this kind of “movie” I did enjoy High School Musical…so I do have my weaknesses, and my sweet moments with pop culture, just not this once

  • John

    Here’s a fun little interview. Robert Pattinson on his role in the movie and his feelings about the book. Video’s near the bottom. Ignore the comment section, it’s a no-man’s land.


    I’m gonna quote one part from near the end.

    “When I read it, I was convinced Stephenie was convinced that she was Bella, and it was like a book that wasn’t supposed to be published. It was like reading her sexual fantasy, especially when she said it was based on a dream and it was like, ‘Oh I’ve had this dream about this really sexy guy,’ and she just writes this book about it. Like some things about Edward are so specific, I was just convinced, like, ‘This woman is mad. She’s completely mad and she’s in love with her own fictional creation.’ And sometimes you would feel uncomfortable reading this thing. It’s kind of a sick pleasure in a lot of ways.”

  • Ryan

    It’s really a sick little phenomenon…the anti-Harry Potter in many ways, I think.

    Props to the actors and actresses (Kristen Stewart gave similar quotes) for not going out and being PR hacks, and actually honestly expressing their feelings about this junk.

  • MaSch

    I do think real vampires could get away with this kind of behaviour in the real world.

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