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artisanal film reviews | by maryann johanson

the oh-no! DVD of the week: ‘Britney Spears: Girls Are Always Right’

BritneyBash.com — which is a gushing fan site, actually, and not a place to bash her, as I’d hoped when I saw that URL — like totally OMG sez:

This 2 DVD set celebrates Britney’s entire working life as it features interviews with the girl herself and those who know her best, archive footage from all eras of her career, rare photographs and film, much from private collections, location shoots and news reports and a host of other features, making this the most enthralling and entertaining documentary film yet on the life of Britney Spears.

I’m so glad we’re getting a complete and comprehensive look at Spears’ life — it was like everyone was expecting us to wait until she was 30 or something before we got a proper documentary about her, or a proper retrospective of all the many eras of her career. Just because an era lasts only six months doesn’t mean it’s not important!

The “girls are always right” attitude does explain a lot, however. As long as a gal is at the wheel of a car, a baby don’t need to be secured in a carseat. A girl can do no wrong!



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  • jo

    You seem bitter and fat.

  • Victor Plenty

    Oh noes! Not bitter and fat! The insult that trumps all possible debate on the basis of ideas and substance has been thrown down already! Now we all have to go home and cry ourselves to sleep, because “jo” has brung out the bitter and fat, leaving nothing worthwhile for anyone else to say.

    Except… wait. None of that makes any sense at all. In fact… let me check here, just to make sure… yes, it’s true. Actually jo’s comment is meaningless and worthless. Who’d have thunk it?

    Meanwhile, to return this conversation to the lofty heights of enlightened discourse, I refer everybody with an open mind to Britney Spears’ Guide to Semiconductor Physics, lest her vital contributions to science go unrecognized yet again. I’ll bet even this latest DVD set failed to mention that site.

  • MaryAnn

    Please please let every Britney fan in the world come to my site, rack up a page view, and tell me I’m bitter and fat.

    Am I bitter? Sure — who with half a brain wouldn’t be, in this world? Am I fat? A tad pudgy at the moment, maybe, if adorably so. Which I’m in the process of fixing.

    And when I’m adorably skinny again, Britney will still be a moron.

  • MaSch

    You’re fixing the adorableness of your pudginess? ;-)

  • Clothes hanger lollipop
    Magazine photo op
    But I’d rather be a pin-up girl
    Than zero size…
    –The Go-Gos, “Throw Me a Curve”

  • Victor Plenty

    Sadly, the global supply of Britney defender page views may have been sharply depleted by Chris Crocker.

    (Link provided for any readers recently returned from that infamous cave on Mars.)

  • joe

    And you wonder why kids today reject feminism.

    It’s because they think that’s what THIS is. Sigh.

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