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the film criticism aspect of cyber | by maryann johanson

trailer break: ‘Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen’

Take a break from work: watch a trailer…


Oh my goodness, Michael Bay does love blowing shit up, don’t he?

Unexplained markings in ancient ruins all around the world? Michael Bay wants to make Raiders of the Lost Ark, methinks. With lots of shit blowing up, of course.

I don’t like to spectulate about man who makes movies this loud and this aggressive and this full of shit blowing up — and this concerned with a character called “Megatron”… Oh, who am I kidding? Of course I love to speculate! I’ve seen this trailer a dozen times, and every time, all I can think is, Michael Bay must have the tiniest penis to feel the need to overcompensate for it this much.

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen opens in the U.K. on June 19, and in the U.S. on June 24.



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movie buzz | trailers
  • “…and then it exploded.” -Galaxy Quest

  • Pollas

    I’m looking forward to it coming out so they’ll stop playing previews for it. Lately each movie I see has a trailer for Transformers during the previews.

  • PaulW

    Well, you see, in all my movies there’ll be exploding penguins. Why? It’ll be my signature move! Like Spielberg with “Close-up on awed facial expression” or Hitchcock’s underlying theme of Catholic guilt or Kurosawa flicks always having a samurai. Me = Exploding Penguins = eventual evening on a Bravo interview show. >:_)

  • MaSch

    My guess about Michael Bay?

    He once stumbled upon a feminist text about the “male gaze” and considered it a fantastic concept.

    Anyone remembers the video clip for “I’d do anything for love”, directed by Bay? Never was there more over-the-top ogling of conventionally beautiful women, outside porn.

    Including porn as well, if one really thinks about it.

  • Michael Bay must have the tiniest penis to feel the need to overcompensate for it this much.

    *gaffaw* *snerk*

  • Josh C.

    I suspect it would be silly of me to hope that the script turns out better for the sequel. When Sam Witwicky said something along the lines of, “I think he wants us to get in the car,” after Bumblebee opens its own door for him and Mikaela, I screamed at my TV screen, “DUH!”

  • Mathias

    If i was Micheal Bay, i’d shock the world by finding the best unmade spec script in hollywood and making a $10 million dollar budgeted indie.

    And, here’s the catch, not only does it not have a single explosion, but not one action beat. But i’d still enjoy lots of explosions, from critics heads of course. :D

  • SaintAndy

    Oh, great! A thread for Bay bashing! God, I hate how he sucks the life/feeling/genuine emotion/symbolism/depth/coherence/add any significant quality for a film here… out of everything he does. For the life of me, I’ll never understand how some people can actually consider his films good.

  • Penis Analysis

    “Michael Bay must have the tiniest penis to feel the need to overcompensate for it this much.”

    BOY ARE U WRONG.
    HIS PENIS IS HUGE! THE BIGGEST I HAVE EVER SEEN. I SWEAR.

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