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the film criticism aspect of cyber | by maryann johanson

trailer break: ‘Pandorum’

Take a break from work: watch a trailer…


How do you think you would react if you knew the truth? Well, I’m guessing that the secret of this spaceship with the messed-up crew and the missing 60,000 passengers will turn out to be less thrilling and far more predictable than the filmmakers would like. Alien mutant zombie whatevers? *yawn* Whatever the reason for the existence of the alien mutant zombie whatevers, I bet this will feel like a 23-minute episode of The Twilight Zone stretched out to feature length by the addition of a whole bunch of long action set pieces that are meant to be exciting and will just feel like the umpeenth retread of Aliens.

Big-budget “science fiction” movies these days make me think about Monty Python’s “cheese shop” sketch: it’s billed as a cheese shop, and the proprietor keeps insisting it is a cheese shop, but it’s entirely uncontaminated by cheese. Just as supposed SF movies these days are entirely uncontaminated by SF. Now, this may turn out not to be the case with this movie, but it’s being sold as if the movie doesn’t bother too much with SF, just with gore and things-that-go-bump scares and the whole and-then-there-were-none thing. Boring.

Pandorum opens in the U.S. on September 25, and in the U.K. on October 2.



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  • JoshDM

    Alien mutant zombie whatevers?

    No. Alien mutant zombie S&M whatevers.

    I blame the Resident Evil movie series (no the video game series) for this line of film drek.

  • I think you have just hit on a core concept:

    SyFy = no Sci Fi

    This looks likes a Sunday Night SyFy Original.

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