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the film criticism aspect of cyber | by maryann johanson

trailer break: ‘Valentine’s Day’

Take a break from work: watch a trailer…


Garry Marshall really is an enemy of women, what with a recent slate that looks like this: Georgia Rule, The Princess Diaries and The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement, Raising Helen, and Runaway Bride. This one looks to be no different. Can we count the stupid clichés about women and romance the trailer alone contains? That they culminate in the lonely, lovelorn woman eating chocolate and thanking god for a vibrating appliance is just about perfect, in an evil, antiperfect kind of way.

Oh, and screenwriter Katherine Fugate wrote The Prince & Me. Just in case it wasn’t clear where all this shit was coming from.

Valentine’s Day is opens in the U.S. and the U.K. on February 12, 2010.



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  • amanohyo

    It’s like some kind of hideous rom-com hydra. What’s this? The “independent” woman plot threads are about a girl who thinks serial monogamy is okay and a woman that thinks she can be happy without a man? Only the power of manly, metrosexual love can teach them the error of their ways.

    Excuse me, young, attractive, white, emotionally unstable, affluent woman? No, not you, the other one. No, not you either, the one in the plot thread after yours… yes you. What that, you’re not actually white? I’m sorry, of course you aren’t, this is a socially progressive movie after all. Do you think you’re happy living alone with your dog? You seriously think your life has any value at all without a man to bestow meaning upon it with his magical penis? Stop lying to yourself, you poor, pitiful creature. You aren’t really happy, how could you be? It’s time to do what women do best, have a public emotional breakdown, and be saved by the wisdom of a magical negro.. uh, I mean, your boss. This is a socially progressive movie after all.

    *barf*

  • Christina

    I can’t help but thinking whenever I see the trailer to this that Richard Curtis already made this movie, and better.

  • RogerBW

    Meanwhile, we will not be happy until men are spending as much on makeup and grooming as women. (Women, you should spend more!)

  • Brian

    Apparently they spent the film’s entire budget on getting *everyone* in the cast. Nothing left for getting an original or interesting script. They must be expecting this to make a bundle of cash.

    And it probably will. *facepalm*

    Say, what kind of fancy hotel allows dogs, anyway? And does anyone really believe Jessica Alba as a blonde? Or an actor?

  • “Say, what kind of fancy hotel allows dogs, anyway?”

    i think you’ll find that a really ‘fancy’ hotel will allow dogs because the kind of people who stay there expect that kind of service. and, in point of fact, i’ve stayed in some not so ‘fancy’ hotels but good ones (Sheratons, Westins) that have specific floors set aside for people with dogs. (now, if only they’d do that with people with *kids*).

  • Apparently they spent the film’s entire budget on getting *everyone* in the cast. Nothing left for getting an original or interesting script. They must be expecting this to make a bundle of cash.

    I’m not too worried about the financials of this movie. I’m sure it’s going to be chock full of product placement.

    Also, for their help in promoting Valentine’s Day and getting people to spend money on it, they are probably receiving grant money from jewelry companies, clothing retailers, the flower industry, etc.

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