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artisanal film reviews | by maryann johanson

Our Family Wedding (review)

Finally! A movie than combines all the gender bashing of terrible TV commercials and awful sitcoms — in which manipulative women must crack the whip on their manchild husbands — with the repulsive wedding porn of every other romantic comedy of recent years. It’s all your cheap, easy “entertainment” needs in one movie. When Hispanic America Ferrera (The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2) and black Lance Gross (Tyler Perry’s Meet the Browns) drop a bomb on their parents — surprise! they’re getting married! in two weeks! and no caterer, dressmaker, or clergyman laughs in their faces at such a fantastical timeline! — all juvenile hell breaks loose as their dads (respectively, Carlos Mencia [The Heartbreak Kid] and Forest Whitaker [Where the Wild Things Are]) take up a sort of warfare in crosscultural dick measuring: who can be the most bigoted, the most insulting, the most childishly repulsive before the movie must shift gears and insist that the audience suddenly actually care about these obnoxious people in time for the big ceremony? In case all that isn’t enough to make you howl in despair, there’s also an allegedly hilarious bit with a goat hopped up on Viagra and a violent Mexican granny who goes ballistic on a wedding cake she disapproves of… on the day of the wedding (and after the nice baker presumably didn’t laugh in their faces, though “You need it when?!” was surely the baker’s reaction). Because everyone should put their own petty desires above those of the people they supposedly love, especially on that loved one’s wedding day.


MPAA: rated PG-13 for some sexual content and brief strong language

viewed at a private screening with an audience of critics

official site | IMDb | trailer
more reviews: Movie Review Query Engine
  • Dr. Rocketscience

    Wait a minute. Carlos Mencia and Forrest Whitaker?
    Don’t you mean George Lopez and Martin Lawrence?

  • MaryAnn

    Don’t you mean George Lopez and Martin Lawrence?

    The script was so stupid, even they turned it down.

  • Nathan F

    And you still thought this was better than Alice in Wonderland?

    Man, Tim Burton must’ve really screwed the pooch on that one

  • MaryAnn

    “Better” is relative.

  • I’m beginning to think Whitaker signed some sort of really bad contract to keep ending up in such bad movies. Me thinks he should have read the fine print.

  • Lisa

    interesting that none of these actots are white

  • Pobrecita America. She really does deserve better. Perhaps if she got a role as Twist on the upcoming American remake of Spaced…okay, I’m kidding! I’m kidding! You all can put down the rotten tomatoes already…

  • Shadowen

    Wait a minute. Carlos Mencia and Forrest Whitaker?

    Don’t you mean Stephenie Meyer and J.K. Rowling?

    Don’t you mean Dane Cook and Edward Norton?

    Don’t you mean bad and good?

    Don’t you mean antimatter and matter?

    Why didn’t the film self-annihilate, is what I’m trying to say?

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