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such a nasty woman | by maryann johanson

question of the day: What’s the weirdest movie or TV product tie-in you can imagine?

I thought the IHOP/Despicable Me connection was a tenuous one — you may have seen the ads on American TV in which little yellow blobby Minions are chowing down on pancakes — but even if IHOP is disgusting, at least there’s something endlessly cute about watching Minions do anything.

But MasterCard prepaid credit cards featuring the characters of The Twilight Saga: Eclipse (from Risky Business via Cinematical). Selling cheap replicas of Edward’s engagement ring present to Bella makes sense, but credit cards? Because we’re not indocrinating our children well enough into the use of plastic?

Now, Cinematical’s Monika Bartyzel wonders how far Volvo’s involvement with the Twilight movies can go. Edward drives a Volvo see (in the books as well as in the movies), and as Bartyzel reports:

As International Promotions president Linda Swick recounts: “With the first film, there was no advertising budget for the C30, so when Volvo received a spike in sales, they realized it correlated with the release of the Twilight movie and, later, the DVD.” Between increased sales and increased traffic in the dealerships, Volvo realized that Stephenie Meyer had written the company one hell of a marketing gift.

From which the natural progression, as Bartyzel amusing notes, must be:

I would be shocked if they didn’t take it to the next level and find a way to have an exclusive Twilight-customized satellite/electronic system. If Edward simply driving a Volvo can inspire a spike in sales with no marketing push, imagine what would happen if their line had the sparkly Cullen, hairy wolves, and human Swans in the mix. As I mused before, Alice would share weather and traffic, while Edward griped about recklessness. Maybe Jacob controls the heat, Charlie tells you to slow down when you’re speeding (since radar detectors aren’t quite kosher), Rosalie takes care of diagnostics, Carlisle handles the emergency alert system … they could even get Renesmee involved with some small, laptop-like camera that takes pictures inside the cabin.

It’s an idea so crazy that it just might work.

What’s the weirdest movie or TV product tie-in you can imagine?

Inception-branded insomnia aids? Toy Story sex toys? (I’m afraid to Google that phrase and discover they already exist.)

I’m a little terrified to see what you’ll come up with.

(If you have a suggestion for a QOTD, feel free to email me. Responses to this QOTD sent by email will be ignored; please post your responses here.)

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  • Erik

    I’d be all for the Volvo stuff if it meant that it could greenlight the Torchwood Edition Land/Range Rover. I’ve wanted that since the first episode of that show.

    I’m also waiting for the official line of Dr. Who fezzes.

  • Ed Duffy

    How can it be appropriate for MasterCard to be represented by a small group of shadowy figures who lure you in with a glamorous, sexy image and end up bleeding you dry? Oh, wait…

  • Drave

    The weirdest one I can imagine isn’t a licensed product, but it also ties in to Twilight. I’ll just say it can be found in adult novelty shops, it sparkles, and it is meant to be used chilled. *shudder*

  • LaSargenta

    I still think the Iron Man men’s cologne the oddest tie-in I’ve ever seen.

  • Boingo

    The “Barefoot Bandit” doing a commercial for
    Nike or Dr. Scholl’s when he’s released-provided
    those companies are still in business.

  • Lynn

    In terms of actual promotions Disney has done some very bizarre stuff. A friend of mine was showing me the other day how weird the spin offs for the Great Mouse Detective were.


    Top of the WTF list on that link for me was the fact that they sold a pipe as merch for a children’s movie. I’m guessing the pipe wouldn’t even make it into the animation today.

    Second is the ‘Song Series Pin’ which has the villain happily dancing while the hero looks on, smirking that has the caption ‘Let Me Be Good to You’

  • Toy Story sex toys? Well, the main characters ARE named Woody and Buzz…

    *runs away fast*

  • RogerBW

    The first credit card tie-in I saw was a Trek Next Gen card at the 1987 Worldcon – around a month before the series launched.

    High on my “weird tie-ins” list is anything consumable – cereal, soap, and so on. But I’m a pack-rat at heart.

  • JoshDM

    Deep Rising branded toilet snake.

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