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artisanal film reviews | by maryann johanson

the oh-no! DVD of the week: ‘Princess and the Pony’

And I’m gonna get a pony for my birthday, and Mommy said I could have a big party and I’m gonna get a pony and me and all my bestest friends are gonna dress up like the most beautifulest princesses ever with pink gowns and glitter in our hair and magic wands and crowns and I’m gonna get a pony and we’re gonna have those nummy cupcakes with the sprinkles on top and then we’re gonna have a sleepover and I’m gonna get a pony and I’m gonna ask Daddy if the pony can come to the sleepover with us and it’s just gonna be the best princess and pony party ever! And I’m gonna get a pony!

That is what the movie’s about, isn’t it?

No, alas. It’s from the cheapo folks at Asylum Entertainment, and it’s alternate title is 1st Furry Valentine. And it looks even worse than it sounds.

A conniving carnival owner? Pul-leeze. Is there any other kind of carnival owner?



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