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artisanal film reviews | by maryann johanson

the oh-no! DVD of the week: ‘Zombie Women of Satan’

Can you read the quote splashed on the cover? This is a “must see zombie film” because it offers “girls, gore, and gross-out gags.” Zombie women, not girls, you pigs. Though they are the kind of women who don’t bother a dude by bitching about whatever it is women can never shut their yaps about. But I’m just guessing here.

From the Amazon U.K. description of the film, from last year:

When a group of nightclub performers – including Pervo the clown, Zeus, a flatulent dwarf, and Skye, a feisty rock chick – arrive on a remote farm for a cable TV interview, they soon discover the dark secret of the sinister family who live there – they have been kidnapping and torturing gorgeous young women as part of a perverted cult. However, the family’s experiments have now gone wrong, and the stocking-clad women have now become ravenous ZOMBIES! Now trapped, our ragtag group of visitors must unite in a desperate bid to stay alive… Sexy, gory and gut-munchingly hilarious – ZOMBIE WOMEN OF SATAN is THE most outrageous zombie comedy movie of the year!

Are Pervo the clown and Zeus the dwarf male or female? Why isn’t that pertinent info, if we must know that the rocker is a chick? So that we know she’s sexy? I bet the zombies are sexy zombies.

I eagerly await the sequel, Zombie Men of Satan.



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