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artisanal film reviews | by maryann johanson

punk-ass indie filmmaker fakes a quote from me to support his movie, gets smacked, hides like a chickenshit (updated)

How Not to Be an Aspiring Filmmaker, Young Asshole Edition.

So apparently some indie filmmaker named Matthew Gaynor — aka @Gerald_Robber on Twitter, aka “freshman at Juniata College studying cinema production” — decided it would be cool to promote a film he made with a fake quote from me:

fakequote

As soon as I called him out on it:

 

he deleted the tweet.

But not before his pal, @_Buffalo_Bill_ — whom I suspect is cofounder of Gaynor’s production company “Bill Lytle- sophomore at Lycoming College studying political science” — could tweet at me to, basically, calm down and just enjoy the movie, condescending to toss a “my dear” in my direction. (Alas, I neglected to screengrab that tweet before that chickenshit deleted it.)

 

These aren’t kids goofing around. These are two guys who have big dreams for themselves as filmmakers:

Visionaries at heart, and masterminds at what they do, Bill and Matthew have set out to take the world by storm with film.

(Also screengrabbed in case they change or delete it.)

And this:

gaynoroscar

I don’t want to hear any bullshit about how these guys are just kids and don’t know any better. Four-year-olds know that lying is wrong. But these two thought it would be cute to pretend a real critic said something nice about their movie. They were wrong. They were also incredibly stupid to think that they wouldn’t get caught.

The Internet sees all… certainly all the stuff you’re dumb enough to actually post. And the Internet never forgets.

UPDATE: These chickenshits still think they’re cute and funny, and their friends do, too:

chickenshits

I’ve still had no response from them to multiple requests for an explanation for their deplorable behavior.

UPDATE 2: Lame generic tweeted apologies:

 

(Screengrab here.)

 

(Screengrab here.)

I’ve had some private Facebook messages, too. Deciding if I should do anything with those…


posted in:
critic buzz | maryann buzz
  • WitchHelga

    Yes it was wrong, but maybe feel flattered that they used your name to endorse their movie? Just trying to find a positive. Still don’t agree with what they did.

  • bbear

    There is nothing flattering about someone stealing your identity and having your reputation tarnished by endorsing a rubbish movie.

  • cinderkeys

    When I saw this on your Facebook page, I noted that the dude couldn’t even capitalize correctly when he pretended to quote you: “The years Best Indie film, simply the best …” Now it occurs to me to wonder why he didn’t at least pretend to be quoting somebody who writes like that.

    He’s a freshman, eh? Maybe that screen grab should find its way to one of his professors if he doesn’t publicly apologize.

    It does make me curious about his film, though. His YouTube page has this to say about it: “Their latest project is entitled IACENTEM, which takes the viewer
    through the curious and vicious battle between reality and deception.”

    So, the movie comes down on the side of deception, then?

  • Robert P

    Lol… it’s wrong of course but there’s a certain humor in it, and it’s a backhanded sort of flattery.

    Regarding honesty as optional like that in deference to promotion would seem to fit the Hollywood image of Hollywood.

    Ironically, ultimately you’re still giving them a bit of publicity. There are probably people who are going to see the movie who wouldn’t have otherwise because you told them about it.

  • Judy

    I so admire how you consistently set strong boundaries and defend them. It is reprehensible when anyone thinks they can lie and should be permitted to get away with it. And that somehow you should just roll over and let them by being a “good sport”. Thanks for being a terrific role model.

  • I considered the “don’t give them more publicity” angle. But I think it’s more important that this sort of thing is called out publicly.

  • I’m not flattered. No one gets to appropriate the reputation I’ve built over 17 years for their own purposes.

  • This sort of thing has nothing to do with whatever sort of role model I’d hope to be. But thank you.

  • They want a vicious battle, they can have one.

  • cinderkeys

    The fake quote not only puts words in her mouth, but badly written words. If that’s the best they can manage for one sentence, I doubt their movie is going to be worth much.

  • Robert P

    That is in no way cool.

    It’s a lot more uncool than I realized having watched a couple of minutes of it on Youtube – LOL… which is all I could take. Good god, who would sit through this whole thing? I’ve seen zero-budget films that were creatively done, this isn’t one of them.

    Apparently their “production company” consists of whatever 720p camera was on sale at Walmart and editing software. Seems they didn’t have the budget for a tripod.

    The credits are actually pretty funny in an unintentional way – full of typos. They have a “production buyer” – that must be the guy who went to Walmart to get the camera. It references the Naill Family Film Foundation….? I’m guessing the Naills are friends who gave them the money for the Walmart camera?

    We’re asked to believe they had both a storyboard artist and a concept artist. Of course they did.

    Anyone wanna bet whether they got the proper clearances for the music on the soundtrack?

  • Bluejay

    It’s a lot more uncool than I realized having watched a couple of minutes of it on Youtube – LOL… which is all I could take.

    Even if their film were a masterpiece, lying about MaryAnn would have been the exact same level of uncool.

  • Bluejay

    Whether or not they’re talented, they’re shitty people. And now their shitty behavior is a matter of public record. They can high-five each other and act all smug and invulnerable now, but this kind of thing will bite them in the ass eventually.

  • LaSargenta

    Send that exchange to the presidents of these brats colleges. Each of the institutions has “truth” in their mottos. Call them on it. You’re not getting any apologies from the children without an adult stepping in.

    It doesn’t get big billing on their website (I had to type ‘honor code’ into the search box), but here is Juniata’s academic code to study and live by: http://www.juniata.edu/services/provost/integrity.html

    Lycoming’s was harder to find. ‘Honor code’ didn’t bring up anything useful. I had to put ‘code of conduct’ into the search box which eventually got me to this Academic Integrity page: http://www.lycoming.edu/studentLife/studentHandbook/academicPolicies.aspx

    Personally, I find that annoying. The phrase ‘honor code’ is well-known and very traditional, so even if they use some other name, it should be embedded in their search term references.

  • Exactly.

  • I am seriously considering making contact with their schools.

  • LaSargenta

    Don’t wait. Manufacturing a pull-quote falls into the plagiarism and academic misrepresentation category. It is likely that his ‘film’ is being made in some way to fullfil part of his program at Juniata.

  • David

    In all honesty Mary Ann, I think you’re taking yourself a little bit too seriously. I haven’t seen the movie and I don’t know these jackasses, but I studied up on you. Congratulations on 17 years of criticism. Now take some of your own. You are as unprofessional as it could possibly appear at a glance. You use the words “pioneer” and “circle jerk” in the same sentence to describe your efforts as a film philosopher. I’ve also read your reviews and can honestly say I’ve never seen “one of online’s finest” miss the mark as tragically as you have.

  • David

    You claim to be the savior of film as Hollywood tears it down to a game of gaudy decoration and cheap thrills, yet, you compromise good worthwhile criticisms in an attempt to be as outrageously witty as possible. Your reviews sound like the type of hipster circle jerking slumber parties that you shy away from.

  • David

    I suggest you stop kissing ass

  • LaSargenta

    I suggest you get a clue about what academic integrity means, regardless of your opinion of this particular reviewer’s reactions.

  • Aj

    Bunch of freelance writers and amature critics at their finest hours these were the exact reasons my
    college professor despised them they try and blow things out of proportion as if they are hollywoods finest however in truth all they can really critique is no name unidentified films and they attempt to draw you in with their so called witty wording but in fact they use vulgar wording such as chickenshits which further tarnishes and takes credibility away from what they have previously stated.

  • Gur

    Maybe you should

  • I just deleted a bunch of comments from a couple of anonymous cowards. You wanna insult me, at least have the courage to use your name.

  • Gur

    Really! telling the school that won’t even give a shit. You’re a piece of shit critic that more than majority of the world doesn’t care what you have to say. So here let me be a critic for a second since anyone can be, here’s my review of you, you really are a good for nothing pain in the ass and have nothing better to do with your life than post negative comments about people. You must have been that little snitch in school that everyone hated because you told on everyone because honestly running and telling their schools will do nothing when the project isn’t even for school and I know this because I know them personally. They made the film for something fun because it’s a hobby they both enjoy in their free time. So please do the whole world a favor and shove it because the world could deal with one less pretend critic.

  • Danielm80

    So please do the whole world a favor and shove it because the world could deal with one less pretend critic

    Actually, a “pretend critic” is someone who makes up a fake quote and posts it on the Internet.

  • Kyle

    Couldn’t agree with Gurr anymore and to get to my point just. A Bunch of freelance writers and amature critics at their finest hours these were the exact reasons my
    college professor despised them they try and blow things out of proportion as if they are hollywoods finest however in truth all they can really critique is no name unidentified films and they attempt to draw you in with their so called witty wording but in fact they use vulgar wording such as chickenshits which further tarnishes and takes credibility away from what they have previously stated.

  • RogerBW

    If you value critical opinion so little, why try to steal it? Sorry, why did these “people you know personally”, who obviously aren’t you at all, try to steal it?

  • Bluejay

    They didn’t tarnish your “reputation” by tweeting that you approve of their movie because no one knows who you are.

    So what they did was okay? It’s only wrong to lie about a critic if that critic is famous? If that’s the kind of moral code you have, you’re part of the problem.

  • I’m closing comments on this. I’m sick of dealing with this issue. And the “supporters” of the filmmaker are doing him (and themselves) no favors.

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