Bandslam (review)
It’s official: rock ’n’ roll has been tamed. It must be if Walden Media (see: the Narnia movies), the movie company known for its family-values agenda (that is, one that adheres to the stereotypical narrow ideas about what constitutes both “family” and “values”) is taking it on. That’s how you get a rock ’n’ roll movie this calculated for sweet, feel-good blandness. And not the rock ’n’ roll kind of feel-good, either, unless you think the Jonas Brothers rock hard. Instantly forgettable but inoffensive, this is the tale of misfit teen Will Burton (the Shia LaBeouf-esque newcomer Gaelan Connell), who moves to a new high school that isn’t quite so much like “Guantanamo with a lunch period” as the old one, makes new friends, and starts managing a high-school band in preparation for the titular competition. Adolescent bumps in the road are struck, of course, but all the would-be excitement here is contrived and melodramatic, and painfully earnest at that -- blame writers Todd Graff and Josh A. Cagan; Graff directs. Isn’t it suspicious that golden-girl cheerleader Charlotte (Aly Michalka) would hang around with the likes of Will? Will he learn to love the “eccentric” Sa5m (Vanessa Hudgens: High School Musical 3: Senior Year) -- the “5” is silent -- and she him, even though she mopes that “emotion is overrated”? Take Nick & Norah’s Infinite Playlist, delete all the raw pain and uncomplicated joy, and this is what you’re left with. It’s not awful, just awfully dull. support
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Thu Aug 13 09, 9:45PM categories: reviews > 2009 theatrical releases permalink 10 pre-Disqus comments Disqus comments infoMPAA: rated PG for some thematic elements and mild language viewed at a semipublic screening with an audience of critics and ordinary moviegoers official site IMDB trailer more reviews at: Movie Review Query Engine dvdAmazon U.S. Amazon Canada Amazon U.K. tip jarshare
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Aly Michalka
coming of ageBandslam Chronicles of Narnia Gaelan Connell Josh A Cagan Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist Shia LaBeouf Todd Graff Vanessa Hudgens Walden Media dramedy teen related· Easy A (review) · August 14: DVD alternatives to this weekend’s multiplex offerings · my week at the movies: ‘Inglourious Basterds,’ ‘District 9’ (again), ‘9,’ ‘Shorts,’ ‘Bandslam,’ ‘Fifty Dead Men Walking,’ ‘The Goods: Live Hard, Sell Hard,’ ‘Ponyo,’ ‘Paper Heart’ (maybe) · totally quotable! 2008 · my week at the movies: ‘Miracle at St. Anna,’ ‘Ghost Town,’ ‘The Duchess,’ ‘Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist,’ ‘Blindness,’ ‘Appaloosa,’ ‘Towelhead’ · U.K. box office: ‘Basterds’ rule · trailer break: ‘Bandslam’ · question of the day: What movie are you most looking forward to in August? · Journey 2: The Mysterious Island (review) · question of the day: Why is there such a voracious appetite for naked-celebrity photos? bloggyprevious post: bias update: August 13 next post: The Time Traveler’s Wife (review) |
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pre-Disqus comments
posted by JOrdan (Fri Aug 14 09, 1:40AM)
You should probably actually watch the movie "BEFORE" you review it.
It's not a great movie but it is good. At least worth 3 stars. But you would know that if you actually went to see it.
posted by Newbs (Fri Aug 14 09, 2:09AM)
Luckily, I do: there is literally no way in hell this movie is any good.
posted by MaSch (Fri Aug 14 09, 3:26AM)
Then why is it a yellow light instead of a red one?
Wait, I guess it's because the movie is too bland to venture into red territory, right?
posted by bonnie (Fri Aug 14 09, 8:02AM)
Your review skills are extremely lacking.
posted by bonnie (Fri Aug 14 09, 8:05AM)
Not saying you're wrong about the movie, having not seen it, but I suppose I'm use to a different style of critiques.
posted by Brian (Fri Aug 14 09, 9:41AM)
I don't know what more you are looking for, bonnie, but this review tells me everything I need to know about this movie. Actually, the last two sentences of this review tell me everything I need to know about this movie.
posted by Alli (Fri Aug 14 09, 9:42AM)
Oh noes. The 13-year-olds are after you now MaryAnn.
posted by Newbs (Fri Aug 14 09, 10:36AM)
No, I was just pointing out that MaryAnn has indeed seen the film, and then I tried to stir things up a bit with some vociferous negativity, despite knowing that JOrdan won't ever stop by to read my response since she's probably just a studio bot (the movie didn't even come out until today, after all).
posted by MaryAnn (Fri Aug 14 09, 3:28PM)
It's yellow because it's not terrible, just not very adventurous. If I had a tween, I wouldn't mind him or her seeing this, but I do wish it were sharper than it is.
posted by Bongwater (Sun Aug 16 09, 2:28AM)
I saw It Might Get Loud tonight, and it seems like the perfect antithesis to this one. Rock and Roll doesn't seem tamed here. A little bit on the guitar geeky side, but it's definitely worth checking out (especially if you're into Page, Edge and/or White). Made me want to go home and pick up that old piece-of-shit Memphis telecaster copy some guy gave me almost 20 years ago.
http://www.sonyclassics.com/itmightgetloud/