Oh, wow. Where to begin even calculating the awful? I’d probably start with the typo -- “ITS’” -- in the first ad (if the computer’s grammar is that bad, I’m not gonna trust it to do anything), and then move on to the painful sexual innuendo in the last two ads. Prior to this, I would have said that I’m a fangirl who would appreciate sexual innuendo of any kind in connection with Doctor Who. Now, I know better.
(h/t to Ken for the YouTube link)
pre-Disqus comments
posted by PaulW (Thu May 06 10, 10:17PM)
You just added this so you could look at the hatstand.
posted by tweeks (Thu May 06 10, 11:13PM)
From the computer nerd's perspective, it's fun to imagine (or "remember"!) the days when a comprehensive list of computer languages included both FORTRAN and FORTRAN 77. 30 years later, I think FORTRAN is still the most popular language on that list.
Nitpick: "assembler" doesn't really count as a featured language. Even back then, I'm pretty sure every computer was expected to come with an assembler. It's a bit like a car company advertising "4 tires included with every vehicle!"
posted by BBQ Platypus (Fri May 07 10, 1:16AM)
Just FYI, I consider these ads to be canon. Note that this means that in the Whoniverse, computers attained sentience in the early 80s.
posted by AJP (Fri May 07 10, 1:20AM)
These ads remind me that I had a huge crush on Lalla Ward, and why I consider Richard Dawkins to be a ridiculously lucky man.
posted by PJK (Fri May 07 10, 1:57AM)
Damn, we used to have one at the school I went to.
It was mostly used by the students for Relay, a local chat client.
All the serious stuff (such as games) was done on the XT and AT level PC's. >B')
At least it was more user friendly than the old Burroughs Mainframe they pestered us with on the University.
posted by gensing (Fri May 07 10, 3:47AM)
MaryAnne - The 'typo' may be just be the fact that there was no apostrophe on a computer back then. Double quotes were used in some languages but I can't remember seeing single quotes or apostrophes. Perhaps I've forgotten, but computers were not very text friendly until after the PC and Mac came along and we started actually writing things on them other than programs.
Tweeks - this is going way back in my addled brain to when I was programming in the US in the 70's and 80's, and 'assembly language' was used (mostly to build assemblers, etc). Maybe "assembler" is what the language was called in Britain? Or the name of the Assembly language specific to Prime Computers. Or maybe a typo? Once 'C' came along, assembly language was pretty much obsolete.
I laughed that I used to know all those languages!
So... my first Dr. Who (I got introduced in Britain in 74) and retro computer ad. Quite a nostalgic post!
posted by MaryAnn (Fri May 07 10, 3:54AM)
Nope, it's definitely a horrendous typo. That screen in the first ad reads:
OK, DOC-
ITS' FIXED
There's an apostrophe there: it's just in the wrong place.
posted by Brian (Fri May 07 10, 12:35PM)
Despite the general silliness, these two have terrific comic timing. I might actually have to track down some DVDs of Doctor Who. I've never watched a single episode. (Yes, I know, this guy was five or six "Doctors" ago. Or something.)
posted by gensing (Fri May 07 10, 1:18PM)
[blockquote]There's an apostrophe there: it's just in the wrong place.[/blockquote]
Oops - my bad.
posted by Tonio Kruger (Fri May 07 10, 3:20PM)
I'm old enough to remember having to load tape-reel drives myself--and yet changing technology has already made them seem as contemporary as pet rocks and mood rings.
Of course, these ads did come out in the same decade that gave us movies like War Games, The Terminator and even Airplane 2, all of which featured sentient computers that went bad.
In fact, for a while there, the "evil computer" cliche seemed like it would become the dominant sci-fi theme of the decade.
Out of the two Romanas, I always preferred Mary Tamm myself. But unfortunately, apart from a bit appearance on an episode of Crime Traveler--a British sci-fi series on which she played the aunt of--you guessed it--a time traveler--she doesn't appear to have done much in a sci-fi sense since she left the show.
For that matter, I find it a bit disturbing that despite the chemistry of Baker and Ward, Lalla's character seemed to be morphing into Jo Grant in some of those ads--at least as far as her personality...
posted by Left_Wing_Fox (Fri May 07 10, 7:05PM)
Heh, did you ever see "Electric Dreams?"
posted by Tonio Kruger (Fri May 07 10, 8:17PM)
No. Did I miss anything?
posted by innpchan (Fri May 07 10, 9:30PM)
Amen!
(Oh, sorry Richard...)
Seriously, though, these are a delight! Thanks for putting them up.
posted by Crowfoot (Fri May 07 10, 10:32PM)
Brian, I agree these two have great comedic timing. May I suggest City of Death if you're serious about checking them out in Doctor Who? That it was written by Douglas Adams just makes it double-plus good!
Thanks for posting these - I've seen one of them, but not the others. Loved it!
posted by Brian (Sat May 08 10, 12:17PM)
Douglas Adams, eh? I'm there!
posted by Left_Wing_Fox (Mon May 10 10, 3:36PM)
No. Did I miss anything?
Probably not. I guess it depends on how much nostalgic fondness you have for 80's films and music.
Architect buys a computer, which gains sentience in an accident involving an overheated modem and a bottle of champagne. Cyrano de Bergerac as played by a musically inclined HAL. Music by Paul Oakley, Jeff Lynne of Electric Light Orchestra, and Culture Club.