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artisanal film reviews | by maryann johanson

Moana movie review: the hero with a thousand faces finally has a female one

Tue Nov 22 2016, 01:02pm | 7 comments

Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them movie review: reparo movens ad imaginem

Thu Nov 17 2016, 10:22pm | 21 comments

The Accountant movie review: by the numbers but outside the lines

Fri Nov 04 2016, 05:26pm | 0 comments

Doctor Strange movie review: even Marvel is now tired of origin stories

Thu Oct 27 2016, 02:31pm | 81 comments

Keeping Up with the Joneses movie review: no, let them go

Mon Oct 24 2016, 03:52pm | 1 comment

Jack Reacher: Never Go Back movie review: don’t go back for the sequel

Wed Oct 19 2016, 04:45pm | 10 comments

Inferno movie review: let’s run through the museum!

Mon Oct 17 2016, 06:59pm | 0 comments

Blood Father movie review: a take-your-daughter-to-work adventure

Fri Oct 07 2016, 11:36am | 1 comment

Deepwater Horizon movie review: blood for oil

Mon Sep 26 2016, 07:42pm | 17 comments

The Magnificent Seven movie review: a dusty, dry husk of a movie

Sat Sep 24 2016, 03:29pm | 59 comments

The Girl with All the Gifts movie review: I believe the children are our future…

Mon Sep 19 2016, 08:50pm | 10 comments

Hell or High Water movie review: there will be blood

Tue Sep 13 2016, 04:35pm | 10 comments

Anthropoid movie review: human-shaped but lacking in human substance

Mon Sep 12 2016, 04:50pm | 9 comments

Kubo and the Two Strings movie review: quest for family

Mon Sep 12 2016, 01:25pm | 11 comments

Ben-Hur movie review: it’s fine, everything is fine

Fri Sep 09 2016, 02:38pm | 9 comments

Robinson Crusoe (aka The Wild Life) movie review: castaway… you know, for kids!

Tue Sep 06 2016, 10:18pm | 8 comments

Morgan movie review: AI why?

Mon Sep 05 2016, 05:18pm | 1 comment

Mechanic: Resurrection movie review: the Jessica Alba-centered fanfic that makes this work

Mon Aug 29 2016, 02:23pm | 8 comments

The Purge: Election Year movie review: soylent green is Donald Trump!

Fri Aug 26 2016, 12:04pm | 3 comments

Black movie review: tragically bad

Fri Aug 19 2016, 03:53pm | 9 comments

War Dogs movie review: sob havoc over this gun fun run

Wed Aug 17 2016, 11:58am | 6 comments

The Shallows movie review: she’s gonna need a bigger surfboard

Fri Aug 12 2016, 11:46am | 13 comments

Pete’s Dragon movie review: big friendly dragon

Mon Aug 08 2016, 08:51pm | 11 comments

Suicide Squad movie review: sh*t squad

Fri Aug 05 2016, 06:30pm | 169 comments

The Legend of Tarzan and Free State of Jones movies review: enough with the white saviors

Mon Aug 01 2016, 04:53pm | 21 comments

Jason Bourne movie review: Bourne again, but why?

Tue Jul 26 2016, 02:19pm | 5 comments

Train to Busan (Busanhaeng) movie review: delays due to zombies

Sat Jul 23 2016, 08:03pm | 16 comments

Star Trek Beyond movie review: future positive (but it won’t come easily)

Thu Jul 21 2016, 05:14pm | 18 comments

Ice Age: Collision Course movie review: where is a mass extinction when you need one?

Mon Jul 18 2016, 02:37pm | 9 comments

Ghostbusters movie review: boo yeah!

Tue Jul 12 2016, 08:05pm | 95 comments

Now You See Me 2 movie review: now you don’t

Fri Jul 08 2016, 07:19pm | 8 comments

The Secret Life of Pets movie review: dogs and cats living together…

Tue Jul 05 2016, 06:01pm | 3 comments

Our Kind of Traitor movie review: ordinary everyday spies

Thu Jun 30 2016, 10:18pm | 0 comments

The BFG movie review: that sense of wonder where it all went wrong

Thu Jun 30 2016, 12:29pm | 3 comments

Independence Day: Resurgence movie review: Precis of Report on Readiness of Planet YD56201.3 to Join Galactic Alliance

Wed Jun 29 2016, 09:59pm | 16 comments

Warcraft: The Beginning (aka Warcraft) movie review: guest review by a white male teenage nerd from 1987

Mon Jun 06 2016, 02:24pm | 277 comments

The Nice Guys movie review: not-so-nice comic noir

Fri Jun 03 2016, 02:51pm | 1 comment

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows movie review: shell schlock

Mon May 30 2016, 10:00pm | 87 comments

Gods of Egypt movie review: those whom the gods wish to punish, they force to watch this movie

Sat May 28 2016, 07:20pm | 12 comments

Victoria movie review: no cutting to the chase here

Wed May 25 2016, 02:35pm | 3 comments

Alice Through the Looking Glass movie review: a mirror cracked

Tue May 24 2016, 09:32pm | 6 comments

X-Men: Apocalypse movie review: everyone knows the third movie is always the worst

Thu May 19 2016, 10:31pm | 20 comments

The Angry Birds Movie movie review: what the shell?

Mon May 16 2016, 03:52pm | 128 comments

Captain America: Civil War movie review: the consequences of superpowers

Fri Apr 29 2016, 09:43pm | 39 comments

Ratchet & Clank movie review: wretched and junk

Thu Apr 28 2016, 12:42pm | 208 comments

Jane Got a Gun movie review: a woman’s view on the Old West

Fri Apr 22 2016, 06:24pm | 1 comment

Miles Ahead movie review: where the music takes you

Fri Apr 22 2016, 02:09pm | 3 comments

Bastille Day (aka The Take) movie review: French toast

Thu Apr 21 2016, 04:26pm | 1 comment

The Jungle Book movie review: welcome to the jungle

Thu Apr 14 2016, 09:36am | 4 comments

Midnight Special movie review: let the children use it

Fri Apr 08 2016, 03:17pm | 2 comments

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