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rare female film critic | by maryann johanson

10 years of Flick Filosopher: cheese by air

Anyone who says I don’t know how to appreciate a stupid movie has obviously never read my review of Stealth. To wit:

Fighter pilot Josh Lucas is “armed for penetration detonation,” he informs us as Stealth opens, and so I just gave up right then and there and decided to go weak in the knees for the next two hours. Which, if you can manage it, is the best way to enjoy a hilariously absurd slice of American cheese like this one.

Supposedly the star of Stealth is not in fact Josh Lucas but actually some sort of supercool robotic warplane that’s the neatest thing since the Brave Little Toaster… Yes, wait, it’s coming back to me. EDI — which stands for Extreme Deep Invader, and no, I’m not even going to go there — is “the future of digital warfare,” and is not meant to suggest Robocop‘s ED-209 at all, not even by dint of the fact that naturally any Hollywood robot that dares to attempt to replace human ingenuity and smarts and incredible hotness will of course be getting a lesson in human ass-kicking.

review of Stealth, posted 07.29.05

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