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maryann johanson | #BlackLivesMatter

the oh-no! DVD of the week: ‘Robsessed’

I actually feel bad for this guy. I think he had no idea what he was in for with Twilight:

The exclusive, Access-All-Areas pass inside the Life of Hollywood’s Hottest New Talent….. Robert Pattinson After clinching “Top Male Hottie” at the Teen Choice Awards, winning “Breakthrough Performance” and “Best Kiss” awards from MTV Movies for his smash hit Twilight, Robert Pattinson is Hollywood’s Hottest Heartthrob!

Or heartthROB!

ROBSSESED is the exclusive and first-ever all-access film into the leading actor’s life, available to own on DVD.

Calm down, girls: You can own only the DVD, not his life.

ROBSESSED charts the British star’s rise to U.S stardom and provides the inside story that led to his international fame and sex symbol status! The exclusive film includes sizzling secrets of Rob’s first kiss, his bullying at school,

Ooo, ooo, tell us: Who did he bully?

and gossip on his co-stars, featuring a great selection of interviews with his acting teacher, former co-star Anne Reid (The Bad Mother’s Handbook), and influential figures in showbiz, as well as some of his super fans! The film is an exclusive, no-holds-barred look at the life of today’s number one hottie in Hollywood. No stone is left unturned as Revolver Entertainment exclusively releases the first-ever documentary on Rob.

“Up until I was 12 my sisters used to dress me up as a girl and introduce me as ‘Claudia’! Twelve was a turning point as I moved to a mixed school and then I became cool and discovered hair gel.” -Robert Pattinson

Okay, now I really do feel sorry for him…

ROBSESSED offers more than a glimpse into Rob’s life, it also provides an insightful and fascinating look into the foundation of the making of the young British actor and his transition to International Superstar.

Makings of an International Superstar: bullying, pubescent crossdressing, hair gel. I hope everyone is taking notes.

The ideal gift and certainly the essential, must-have DVD for any Robert Pattinson fan!


And this is from the “review” that appears on the Amazon U.S. page (not a user review, either):

To say that pop culture is obsessed with Robert Pattinson would be an understatement. We magnify everything from his perfectly hung jeans, to his unruly tousled hair, to his favorite ripped teeshirt.

We do? We magnify?

In the all new documentary titled Robsessed fans are catapulted into a dream universe where everything revolves around Robert Pattinson. In the film, fans get exclusive never before heard tidbits from Pattinson’s life, documented by his fellow colleagues, teachers, neighbors, and journalists.

Oh, dear god, the poor guy! Is there no one in his life who won’t share every embarrassing scrap about him?

Ride along, as his drama teacher describes the passion and talent the young Pattinson displayed while his coworker talks about modeling with him back in the day. Hold on tight because Robsessed is an hour full of thrills, screams, and maybe a tear or two as you uncover the mystery behind one of the most obsessed about actors in pop culture today.

Why do I imagine this “reviewer” going through Pattinson’s garbage for evidence of his love for her?

Wait: screams?

OMG! The Region 2 DVD comes with a Free 2010 Photo Calendar. *swoon*

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