film criticism by maryann johanson | handcrafted since 1997
Nice Guy garbage man Josh Lucas negs sad sack Katie Holmes. Based on the pernicious self-help philosophy that insists that everything wrong with your life is your fault. You know: feel-good romance!
Simple, yet stupid. A magic box grants a teen wishes… that don’t come free. Apparently they’re not making eighth graders read “The Monkey’s Paw” anymore.
I’ve never seen the show that spawned it, but it was still exactly what I was expecting. I am neither overwhelmed nor underwhelmed by it. I am whelmed.
‘You got your sperm in my uterus!’ ‘No, I got my sperm in this little cup here. *You* got my sperm in your uterus.’ It’s the charming romantic comedy you’ve been waiting for!
What the hell? This cheesy end-of-summer, August-dumping-ground 3D horror movie is chock full of actors you’ve actually heard of…
I cannot tell you how ineptly hilarious this ‘thriller’ is, from its weirdly retro vibe — as if the feminism of the 1970s, 80s, 90s and 2000s had not come between manhunting women and the poor saps they prey on — to its outrageous telegraphing of its “big’ finale.
So how else can I react to Mission to Mars but with enthusiasm? Here is a mostly scientifically accurate movie about the planet that actually looks as if it were filmed there. No, it’s not a perfect film — but as one of the like-minded friends with whom I saw Mission to Mars pointed out, we’re so hungry for real science fiction on film that we can forgive its flaws.
I hate cockroaches. Disgusting things. And yet this is one of the cutest movies I have ever seen.
