dream cast: hypothetical ‘Taxi’ movie

It’s Thursday, and that means it’s time to remake an 80s classic TV show or movie with an all-new cast. This week: Taxi, the 1978-83 ABC-then-NBC sitcom about New York City cab drivers and their abusive dispatcher.

(If you have a suggestion for an 80s TV show or movie we should play with, feel free to email me.)
The original cast included:

Alex Rieger: Judd Hirsch
Louie De Palma: Danny DeVito
Elaine O’Connor Nardo: Marilu Henner
Tony Banta: Tony Danza
Bobby Wheeler: Jeff Conaway
Reverend Jim Ignatowski: Christopher Lloyd
Latka Gravas: Andy Kaufman
Simka Dahblitz-Gravas: Carol Kane

My dream cast:

Alex Rieger: Connor Trinneer
Louie De Palma: Peter Dinklage*
Elaine O’Connor Nardo: Zooey Deschanel
Tony Banta: Noel Clarke
Bobby Wheeler: Owen Wilson
Reverend Jim Ignatowski: Hugh Laurie
Latka Gravas: Eddie Izzard
Simka Dahblitz-Gravas: Catherine Tate

*not cuz he’s little, cuz he does mean so funny

Who would you cast?

I remember the first time I saw this scene. I’ve rarely laughed so hard: