Bad Santa movie review: none more black

So, when I attended a screening on November 14, I was already primed for *Bad Santa,* the meanest, curmudgeonliest, blackest holiday movie I’ve ever seen, and I’ve seen most of ’em. It’s like, How much more black could it be? And the answer is None, none more black. I haven’t laughed at film this hard all year, and maybe not last year, either. And much of that laughter sprung from shock: I spent half the film saying to myself, ‘Holy crap, I can’t believe they did that!’ and ‘They did *not* just do that!’ It’s hard to be shocking in the era of the Farrelly Brothers, but *Bad Santa* is shocking partly because it’s so unrepentant and unapologetic. There’s no attempt to infuse the film with heart or soul or sweetness or light. *Bad Santa* unrelentingly twisted. And that’s just wonderful.

Elf (review)

If only there really were a Santa, and he really had a Naughty list, and there really were consequences for getting oneself on that list. Then we could at least hope for lumps of coal to be distributed to the guilty parties behind *Elf.* But there is no Santa, and the world is full of Naughty people who not only go coal-free but get bonuses for their Naughtiness when it doesn’t even try to appeal to anything beyond the lowest-common denominator and becomes a huge hit.

Love Actually (review)

You know me. You know I hate romantic comedies, mostly. You know I think they tend to be phony, they tend to show off the worst sides of both men and women, and they tend to be neither romantic nor comedic. So you gotta be suspecting that a film billed as ‘the ultimate romantic comedy’ would have me running screaming in opposite direction as if my life depending upon escape.

The Christmas Shoes (review)

Can you believe it? They made a movie out of that insanely inane song. And when I say “they,” I mean the insidious They: our overlords in the military- industrial- entertainment complex, offering us some (supposedly) feel-good pabulum about downsizing, about trading in the corporate fast-track to teach elementary school, about the nobility of the struggling working class, about how we should all be grateful we’re together this Christmas and no one’s dying of congestive heart failure.

It’s a Very Merry Muppet Christmas Movie (review)

Snarky and sweet at the same time and loaded with cameos of celebs having a great time, it’s even set in the old Muppet Theater, like the show was, with the star on the door of Miss Piggy’s dressing room and Statler and Waldorf heckling from the balcony and everything. I felt 8 years old again.

Christmas Rush (review)

*Christmas Rush* has all the inevitability of, well, the made-for-TBS Superstation movie that it is, but it has a goofy kind of wannabe *Die Hard* charm to it. Only half the laughs are unintentional and, actually, the best ones are intended. I think.

Santa Clause 2 (review)

By three minutes into the film I was so caught up in its genuine, unsentimental Christmas magic that I forgot to be snide and sarcastic and cynical. *Santa Clause 2* is just that wonderful. Oh, it’s nice to be reminded how much fun Christmas is.

Scrooge (review)

Scrooge follows the basic tale somewhat faithfully, at least in the beginning. But it rapidly morphs into something Dickens probably wouldn’t recognize, a production that suffers from its theatrical roots and its need to not only make its antihero see the error of his ways but go way overboard in making up for his past.