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Finally! A movie than combines all the gender bashing of terrible TV commercials and awful sitcoms — in which manipulative women must crack the whip on their manchild husbands — with the repulsive wedding porn of every other romantic comedy of recent years.
Shame on Silent Bob. I realize that times is tough and everyone’s gotta make a living, and that that’s probably why Kevin Smith agreed to direct a big-budget studio buddy action comedy. But shame on him anyway.
Just as Bob and Doug McKenzie were sendups of both stereotypes of Canadians and cable access programs, so is *Red Green,* which apes homemade TV of both the DIY and outdoorsmanship stripes.
The movie is build from bricks of ridiculous mortared together with the preposterous and painted over with the hugely unlikely. But that don’t mean I didn’t have a blast while I was sitting there in the screening room quaffing it.
Insufficiently advanced magic is indistinguishable from the ruthlessly forced faux charm of a witless, sloppily assembled, lazily crafted movie that believes it can get away with such shoddiness because it’s ‘for kids.’
One wonders what sins Jackie Chan could have committed in a single lifetime to warrant having an abomination like this pathetic excuse for a movie weighing down his karma.
Please, horny teenaged lads — *please* — do not heed the “advice” of movies like this one, which mistakes being an unappealing doormat reeking of desperation (which girls don’t like) for being a genuinely nice guy (which girls do like)…
When a paralyzed Marine takes part in a daring biological experiment on another planet, he encounters a remarkable alien civilization– No, wait: that’s *Avatar.* This movie is about singing cartoon rodents.
You know how they say that cops come in only one color, blue? Well, Disney princesses come in only one color: pink.
As pure drama, these are still fascinating to watch, especially to see the early work of some now very famous names. But as a look at what TV was doing half a century ago, it’s riveting.
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