Anonymous (review)
A tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing. It is a fusty nut with no kernel. It speaks an infinite deal of nothing.
reviews
The Adventures of Tintin: The Secret of the Unicorn (review)
A soulless CGI-animated remake of Raiders of the Lost Ark. Without a Harrison Ford to smirk and snark his way through it, natch.
Restless (review)
Crams the “quirky” back into the please-god-kill-me-and-save-me-from-yet-another-ridiculous-teen-romance.
Contagion movie review
Ohmygod the germs, the germs! They’re everywhere!
Paranormal Activity 3 (review)
When the only mildly creepy thing a horror film trailer has to offer doesn’t appear in the actual film, that’s bad.
The Help (review)
If movies that’re all men and no women can be universal, so can this one. This is The Shawshank Redemption.
Real Steel (review)
This is a ridiculous movie. And yet, I enjoyed the hell out it. Not just because Hugh Jackman is in it. In IMAX. Though that doesn’t hurt.
The Three Musketeers (review)
It is leaden where it should be light. It is graceless and charmless. It reels from the painful banter. It is the epitome of empty soulless corporate filmmaking.
The Way movie review
An updated The Canterbury Tales for the 21st century, an on-the-road movie for our existentially confused times…
Footloose (review)
I wish I could say I didn’t know why anyone would bother xeroxing a nearly 30-year-old movie, but I do know why. And it ain’t pretty.
