the curmudgeonly movie lover’s unpleasant Advent calendar: December 21
All the tinsel too bright and cheery? Click or tap for some holiday anti-cheer!
Santa Claus Conquers the Martians
question of the day: Why are so many Christmas movies so terrible?
Now we come to that time of year when the cinematic faithful find ourselves pondering a great mystery…
The Nutcracker in 3D (review)
You already know the score — duh da-duh-da-duh! duh da-duh-da-duh! — but in case you’ve forgotten, The Nutcracker in 3D will attempt to mainline it into your brain, fuel-injecting sugar-plum fairy juice into your festivus lobe at the drop of, um, a sugar plum. If you think that’s a horrendously mixed metaphor, it’s got nothing on this polar-express train wreck…
retro trailer: ‘Santa Claus Conquers the Martians’
Take a look back at an old trailer… I’m not sure whether this is actually more unbearable to watch than the movie itself, or whether it’s better just by sheer dint of its being shorter. I might have to watch it again to be sure… Yup, it’s worse than the movie. There’s gotta be a … more…
