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Kevin Bacon’s got one of each — scythe and machete — in his garage in *Death Sentence.* He’s a white-shirt-wearing, window-office-occupying corporate cog at an insurance company. Surely the biggest danger he is in would be from, you know, paper cuts on the risk-analysis reports he handles on a daily basis. Right? How did he know to have such deadly tools at the ready?
Balls of Fury Remember that bit in Forrest Gump where he plays a lot of ping pong? Someone saw that while stoned and thought it was waaaay more hilarious than it actually was. Then he got more stoned and wrote this. (now playing; my review is here) Death Sentence The director of Saw forces Kevin … more…
It’s Labor Day weekend, which means summer is officially unofficially over, although the only people who care are those for whom the unofficial change of seasons is really important. Like kids, who have to shuffle back to school. And people obsessed with movies, because now we move from the season of Big Stupid Blockbusters into … more…
I couldn’t tell you what night USA Networks’ Burn Notice airs. I’d had no plans whatsoever to watch it at all, but I was channel surfing one day soon after it debuted earlier this summer and came across an episode, and something I saw — which I’ll get to in a moment — made me … more…
Funnily enough, though — and it’s the only thing funny about this dreadful excuse for a comedy — the movie itself has tiny balls. It’s got no nerve, no guts, no daring… no balls.
See it: • Red Road [buy it]. From my review: This prickly sketch of a vengeance born out of loneliness and alienation carries the weight of horror of the everyday — it’s not a thriller and there’s nothing Hollywood-exaggerated about it, which makes it all the more disturbing, and all the harder to dismiss. • … more…
Still got a head full of ‘Doctor Who.’ Sorry.
it’s like how much more black could it be? I thought last week that I’d have a movie-free week this week, but that’s not working out. There are so many movies opening from September onward toward the end of the year that if I don’t get a head start, I’ll be drowning before I know … more…
It’s a sickness, I tell ya. A sickness. I hate you, Russell Davies. And I hate you, David Tennant. Hate. Please just go away and take the Doctor out of my head when you leave. I’m begging you.
…come back tomorrow. Sorry…
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