question of the day: If you had a magic wand, which bits of offensive TV would you censor for yourself?

UPI yesterday reported that Turkish television authorities have lost a bid to ban smoking from local airing of Mad Men… by digitally blurring out cigarettes:

ANKARA, Turkey, Feb. 16 (UPI) — Two Turkish television stations were each fined $33,000 for airing shows such as the U.S.-produced “Mad Men” that feature smoking.

The fines levied by the Supreme Board of Radio and Television were successfully challenged by channels E2, which airs “Mad Men” and TV8, which airs the popular French cartoon, “Tin Tin,” the Hurriyet newspaper reported Tuesday.

The stations argued the various programs had been produced before the on-air smoking ban was instituted, the newspaper said.

Additionally, the required practice of blurring out cigarettes was criticized as counterproductive by one of the board’s members, who said the distortion attracts more attention.

The Supreme Board lost, but still: what a brilliant idea! We could all just erase away with the bits of a show we don’t like while leaving everything else intact. (As commenters at a Jezebel post on the story noted, while the Turks may have a problem with historically accurate smoking, apparently historically accurate rape and misogyny is a-okay with them.) It’s like a neutron bomb for TV!

If you had a magic wand, which bits of offensive TV would you censor for yourself?

I don’t watch sitcoms, but if I did, I would replace the face of every dumb, pudgy, ugly, obnoxious, childish sitcom husband whose sitcom wife is beautiful, slender, and noble for putting up with all his bullshit with a still of George Clooney. It still wouldn’t make those shows watchable, though…

(If you have a suggestion for a QOTD, feel free to email me. Responses to this QOTD sent by email will be ignored; please post your responses here.)

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RyanT
RyanT
Wed, Feb 17, 2010 11:08am

Ban any reality TV show involving kids. I’m sure there are some “good” ones out there, but I’d rather just blanket ban everything for the sake of sanity.

Alli
Alli
Wed, Feb 17, 2010 11:30am

I’d replace every Fox News “anchor” and pundit with a kitten.

zepto
zepto
Wed, Feb 17, 2010 12:54pm

I would ban all watermarks and pop-up ads.

Ken Patterson
Wed, Feb 17, 2010 1:16pm

I’d do some sort of reverse charm where everyone watching will have the offensive-to-them bits amplified.

I hate it when people get offended, continue to watch and then complain. If you are offended – turn the channel (there’s 500+ channels of crap to watch) or turn it off and go for a walk.

And for those of you who use the “Think of the children” argument, monitor what your kids watch. Better still, become a program direnctor at home and allow only pre-approved DVDs to watch – or if you have a DVR, store up approved programs. If that’s too much work, tell them to go and paly with some friends, or read a book!

Thus ends the rant of a former TV programmer…

Ogami Itto
Ogami Itto
Wed, Feb 17, 2010 1:19pm

If you had a magic wand, which bits of offensive TV would you censor for yourself?

TV commercials; I’d ban about 99.9% of them. And Glenn Beck. The dude’s seriously deranged.

PaulW
PaulW
Wed, Feb 17, 2010 1:23pm

I wouldn’t ban much. Just my enemies.

aquila6
aquila6
Wed, Feb 17, 2010 4:55pm

MSNBC.

Accounting Ninja
Accounting Ninja
Wed, Feb 17, 2010 5:08pm

Seth MacFarlane’s rape jokes.

PattiH
PattiH
Wed, Feb 17, 2010 5:20pm

I’m with zepto–watermarks and pop-ups. Then I’d get rid of smooshed and time-compressed credits and make them run full screen at normal speed, like they used.

Paul
Paul
Wed, Feb 17, 2010 6:50pm

If you don’t mind my being retroactive, back when I was in college, it annoyed me when FOX messed with Star Trek to show more football. So I would have cut the ending of football games so I could watch the beginnings of my Star Trek: Next Gen episodes.

Bzero
Wed, Feb 17, 2010 7:30pm

@Paul But football is important! STFU, nerd! ;)

Alli
Alli
Fri, Feb 19, 2010 1:42am

I agree with Accounting Ninja. I used to like that show a long time ago, but I haven’t watched it in years. Those rape jokes never have a hint of satire or irony, they’re just there to piss people off. Either that or MacFarlane really thinks rape is funny.