reviews

This coming Monday will be the 91st anniversary of the sinking of the *Titanic,* and if that reminder doesn’t cause a little frisson of excitement or ghostly goosebumps, then just stop reading now, because *Ghosts of the Abyss* is not for you. For me, the *Titanic* was always one of those terrible, fascinating moments in history — it obsessed me as a kid. Clive Cussler’s *Raise the Titanic!*? Classic. Robert Ballard, who found the ship’s resting grounds in 1985? Hero. Do I still sob my way through Jack and Rose’s journey on the ship, even after umpteen viewings? You bet.

The nice, intelligent, overachieving high schoolers don’t usually get their turn on the big screen — punishment for ruining the grade curve, maybe — so this black comedy from first-time director Justin Lin is more than welcome, even if it’s not entirely successful. Did I say “nice”? In their downtime between running the school paper, … more…

I thought I had given up trying to understand the appeal of The Adam Sandler Movie(TM), and then along comes something so diametrically opposite of the typical ASM and yet so similarly misbegotten that it simply demands explanation. Though I’m certain I’ll be unable to provide it for myself. Instead of his usual crude, lewd … more…

If this weirdly disturbing daddy-fantasy feels like a missing Hayley Mills Disney flick from the 60s, it’s no wonder: It’s based on a screenplay from 1958, and the contemporary updating it’s been subjected to only succeeds in adding a layer of ickiness. Seventeen-year-old Daphne Reynolds (Amanda Bynes: Big Fat Liar) escapes from her wacky childhood … more…

Ugh. Him Vin Diesel. Him big lug. *grunt* Him DEA. Him make big bust. Him wife killed by druglord. Him sad. Him vow vengeance. (sound of indecent scratching) Him no control self. Him go crazy. Him boss must ask for gun and badge, which him shames with him behavior. Ugh. Cars go fast. Zoom! Cars … more…

Terrorists blow up a tanker truck on a crowded city highway, spreading a deadly bioweapon… and that’s just their warm-up. Don’t worry — this isn’t breaking news, it’s just the movie version of the anime import TV series that runs here in the States on Cartoon Network. The “cowboys” are a band of bounty hunters … more…

Even if you didn’t know this was a Stephen King thing, you’d know it was King. *Dreamcatcher* is a veritable stew of all the things King loves: preternaturally talented kids, ESP, bodily invasion, childhood friendships cemented by traumatic experience, secret government projects, all drenched in really gross and gory entrails. And it’s as compelling and confounding and compulsively enjoyable as any of King’s writings. It’s not classic King, but even at his worst, he’s still pretty damn good.