There is barely an original thought in this wackadoodle sci-fi panto, just a lot of tiresome passé attitudes skidding among bug-eyed-monster set dressing.
If you could add one thing to Steve’s list that he absolutely must catch up with in order to be considered a with-it 2010s kind of guy, what would it be?
Colombiana fofana, Zoe Saldana banana. C’mon, sing it with me! C’mon! It makes more sense than the movie, and it’s more entertaining to boot.
Oh. My. God. How cool does this look?
I suspected The Fifth Element was gonna turn out to be a bunch of claptrap, and I was right. It’s a visually stunning film, to be sure — I’m a sucker for gorgeous spaceships and gorgeous spacescapes — but ultimately it’s a strange brew of Blade Runner, Raiders of the Lost Ark, and Douglas Adams, mixed with a lot of pseudoreligious, pseudoscientific nonsense.