The Ice Age flicks are the cinematic equivalent of drive-through nuggets of reconstituted chicken slurry served by a bored teenager in a cardboard hat.
It’s one joke dragged out for 90 minutes, and while it’s not entirely unamusing, the comedy feels mired in the same stoner fog as its slacker protagonist.
Jon Favreau’s midlife artistic crisis rendered as food porn. Funny, poignant, and wise, though the wish-fulfillment romantic fantasy of it is a tad much.
Sub-vaudeville 1950s sitcom humor and a horrifically dated message about boys as heroes and girls as the heroes’ property. You know, for kids!
It’s movies like this one that make me despair. Because it is going to make a bazillion bucks at the box office around the world, and there’s absolute nothing here that warrants such success.
“You’ve got more balls than a Chinese ping-pong tournamant.” –Val (John Leguizamo) to Mick (Matthew McConaughey)
Josh Lucas and Matthew McConaughey have never actually appeared onscreen together before. It had been entirely possible, up till this moment, that they were the same person, in a Jekyll-and-Hyde sort of way. Would this be how the universe ends, with parallel-universe versions of the same actor causing all of infinity to collapse into some hellish singularity?
The ambiguity of it all is at least as frustrating as it is intriguing, but director Brad Anderson whips it into something gorgeously terrifying, creating a sense of menace out of shadow and darkness the likes of which I’m not sure I’ve ever seen on film before.
Fun for Wednesdays! We look at an image from an upcoming movie and write snarky, witty, or otherwise entertaining captions for it. No prizes, it’s just for fun. Gamer, from the guys who gave us the Crank movies, will open on Friday without benefit of press screenings. I’ll be there, however, and will report asap … more…
This is how far cartoons have descended in the last decade and a half: *The Lion King* was Shakespearean. *Ice Age* is *Everybody Loves Raymond*ean.