Bounces from one preposterous setpiece to another across an inexcusably flavorless magical, monstrous world, and borderline incoherent as it races through the plots of half a dozen different films.
Why is the U.S. marketing for Survivor pretending that Milla Jovovich is not the protagonist of the film?
If there’s a thriller to be found in international travel regulations, this is not it. Makes a mockery of the unsung heroes it’s meant to celebrate.
It is leaden where it should be light. It is graceless and charmless. It reels from the painful banter. It is the epitome of empty soulless corporate filmmaking.
No, wait: lemme guess what we’re meant to take from this turgid drama of small lives and smaller ambitions. ‘Some people do bad things and go to prison, and some people do bad things and live their lives out in the wide world as if they’re in prison anyway’? ‘Crazy, quietly desperate men are sad and sympathetic, and crazy, aggressively desperate women are slutty objects of derision’?
In Resident Evil: Afterlife 3D, the 187th installment in the series, Milla Jovovich continues kicking zombie ass in… and this time it’s in 3D! This flick sprang from (among other films)…
Paul W.S. Anderson loves him some style without style, texture without substance: this is all white noise, visual static to make the movie pop more in 3D.
Is this the best way to convince New Yorkers to come out for a zombie apocalypse movie on the weekend of the ninth anniversary of the biggest disaster in city history?
And they have to rescue at least one big strong badass guy from mortal danger…
We know how it is: You’d like to go to the movies this weekend, but you’re gonna be busy staring at a big button, arguing with yourself about whether or not to push it. But you can have a multiplex-like experience at home with a collection of the right DVDs. And when someone asks you … more…