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maryann johanson | #BlackLivesMatter

‘Doctor Who’ not-blogging: “Journey’s End”

I dunno what to say.

I hate Russell Davies, and I love him. Much as I hate the Doctor, and love him.

After that opening bit, which felt so anticlimactic — and after I spent a week with my stomach in knots — I felt this by the middle of the episode: that if I did not want to draw-and-quarter Davies by the end because he’d tortured us and jerked us around and been so mean to us, I would want to draw-and-quarter him for managing to pull this all off and not make me want to do that. If you see what I mean.
The end, for you-know-who… It’s so much more tragic than I had imagined it could be.

And the not-end, for the other you-know-how (on the beach with the new friend) … Also so much more tragic than I had ever anticipated.

This is the important thing that I ended the episode with: I half feared that however this turned out, I wouldn’t be able to enjoy Hamlet with David Tennant this fall. But that scene, the one that the image above is from, when the Doctor is angry and griefstricken and guilty and a total fucking mess? It made me realize that I will never, ever be able to hate Tennant, because he’s brilliant. Which I also saw in the other scenes, ahem, on the TARDIS with Donna. When he shows what a wonderful comic mimic he is. I simply love him — Tennant, I mean — and I can’t now imagine ever not loving him, and I’m ashamed that I ever thought I might not.

Oh, and then there’s this: As awful and heartbreaking as this all is — I was in tears by the end — again I can’t imagine how Davies got into my head and knew how my fan fiction was going, even the stuff I haven’t yet written. It’s spooky… because it’s going to be so easy to slot my new stories in around this. Which is weird. Someone tell him to get out of my brain.

(Feel free to spoil in the comments, and so don’t read the comments if you don’t want to have it all ruined for you. Oh, and I’ll continue my more in-depth Doctor Who blogging later this week, with “Midnight” when it airs on the Sci Fi Channel here in the U.S. this coming Friday, July 11.)

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