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cultural vandal | by maryann johanson

the oh-no! DVD of the week: ‘Cardio for Indie Rockers’

At first glance I thought this was a workout for indie rockers to keep in good enough shape to be able to bounce around the basement stage of their local alternative venues. But it seems it’s for wannabe indie rockers, kinda like if air guitar could give you a decent workout:

Chaos, our favorite certified personal trainer who hardens the cores of rockstars throughout Hollywood, is back with a brand-new hardcore workout focusing on strength and endurance that will help you burn fat and tone muscle while you rock out to some of the coolest new music.

Once again you’ll be able to choose from three selectable audio channels of music to best fit the workout you have in mind: Indie Rock / Punk / Heavy.

I dunno, but “rocker workout” is kinda a contradiction in terms, isn’t it? Rock ’n’ roll is supposed to be about abusing your body, not taking care of it. (See also: disgustingly wholesome rockers. WTF?)

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