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cultural vandal | by maryann johanson

the oh-no! DVD of the week: ‘Heaven’s Gym – Inspiration’

Jesus loves you, but he thinks you’re kinda flabby, and not very limber:

Welcome to Heaven’s Gym! Each of us needs some INSPIRATION to kick start some new healthy lifestyle practices. The Word of God is going to be our INSPIRATION for this workout, and it will provide all we need to take it to the limit physically and spiritually. In this program you’ll be physically challenged, mentally stimulated and spiritually motivated. This beginner’s stretch workout will nourish your spirit in God’s word while helping you: Increase flexibility Reduce stress Improve your circulation Heaven’s Gym is here to help you grow physically, mentally and spiritually. Enjoy the journey!

There’s a whole series of these “Christian-inspired workouts”! There’s also Power, Reflection, Outlook, Hope, Focus, and Courage. I didn’t know you could exercise to improve your “courage” or “reflection,” but these are the things I’m missing out on as an atheist.

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