bonus Halloween oh-no! DVD of the week: ‘Stan Helsing’

There were so many crappy, cheesy, dumb, and otherwise worthy of an oh-no! DVDs this week that I can’t resist pointing them out. What is it about Halloween that inspires people to make really really stupid movies?

In the vein of spoof cinema like Austin Powers and the Scary Movie franchise, Stan Helsing lampoons contemporary film audiences’ never-ending fascination with what makes our blood curdle. In the story, hapless video store clerk Stan Helsing (Steve Howey) and his friends must make a routine video delivery on Halloween night before going to a Halloween party. But when a chain of seemingly random mishaps strand Stan and the gang in Stormy Night Estates, Stan learns of his true destiny as a descendant of the legendary monster-hunter Van Helsing. With his motley band in tow – including his best friend Teddy (“Saturday Night Live” star Kenan Thompson), he will battle evil in the form of parodies of movie monster icons “Freddy,” “Jason,” “Leatherface,” “Pinhead,” “Michael Myers,” and “Chucky”! The ultimate confrontation between good and evil will require immeasurable courage, grim determination – and a flair for karaoke?!?

Of course, they’ve also rolled out the corpse of Leslie Nielsen for this one. Why don’t they just leave the poor man alone?

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Hank Graham
Hank Graham
Wed, Oct 28, 2009 12:39pm

The thing about Halloween is that there are so many low-budget successes that have been made for it: Night of the Living Dead, Friday the 13th, Phantasm, The Blair Witch Project, Halloween (the John Carpenter version).

So if you’re a filmmaker without too much creativity and a desire to make a low-budget feature, it looks like an easy way to go. Hey, present-day horror movies can be made cheaply and can rake in the big bucks! I know, let’s make “When a Stranger Calls”!

Wed, Oct 28, 2009 2:54pm

While the actual film looks pretty ghastly, I have to say “Stan Helsing” is one of my favorite titles for a movie ever. I kinda want someone else to steal the name and make a better film around it.