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die hard is a xmas movie | by maryann johanson

the oh-no! DVD of the week: ‘Sex Trek – Welcome To The Starship Intercourse’

A brief list of all the Star Trek phrases, terms, and dialogue that are funnier if you think like a horny 12-year-old boy or a hornier 27-year-old fan-fiction-writing girl… no pornification required!

captain’s log
beam me up
where no man has gone before
wormhole
resistance is futile
“Damn it, Jim!”
engage
fully functional
phasers on stun
assimilate this
“I am not a merry man!”
line of duty
“Please state the nature of the medical emergency.”
“These are people, not robots.”
“This is a military vessel, not a pleasure craft.”
“That’s justice, not malevolence.”
“They’re Klingons, not kittens.”
“You’re a doctor, not a first-contact specialist.”
warp factor 10

Feel free to add your own: it’s fun!



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