The irrational world was rocked this week when scientists announced that the astrological system we’ve been relying on for millennia to make our way through daily life is wrong (via Time News Feed):
The field of astrology, which is concerned with horoscopes and the like, felt a major disruption from astronomers, who are concerned with actual stars and planets. The astronomers from the Minnesota Planetarium Society found that because of the moon’s gravitational pull on Earth, the alignment of the stars was pushed by about a month.
“When [astrologers] say that the sun is in Pisces, it’s really not in Pisces,” noted Parke Kunkle, a member of the group’s board. Your astrological sign is determined by the position of the sun on the day you were born, so that means everything you thought you knew about your horoscope is wrong.
Actual astrologers, as distinct from those party-pooping scientists, say this is all bull puckey, and everything is fine with the horoscopes they’ve bamboozled their livings out of.
Scientists, who’ve been trying to tell us all along that astrology is bunk, say the astrological signs we know so well actually break down, birthdate wise, like this:
Capricorn: Jan. 20-Feb. 16
Aquarius: Feb. 16-March 11
Pisces: March 11-April 18
Aries: April 18-May 13
Taurus: May 13-June 21
Gemini: June 21-July 20
Cancer: July 20-Aug. 10
Leo: Aug. 10-Sept. 16
Virgo: Sept. 16-Oct. 30
Libra: Oct. 30-Nov. 23
Scorpio: Nov. 23-29
Ophiuchus: Nov. 29-Dec. 17
Sagittarius: Dec. 17-Jan. 20
Thank God I’m still a Leo.
Are you suddenly an Ophiucus? Poor thing. You can read all about what this means here.
How are you coping with the shift in astrological signs? Have the foundations of your self-identity been pulled out from under you? Do you need a hug?
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