Hot Pursuit movie review: nice rack and ruin
Spectacularly misogynist. Every single attempt at humor — all of which fail — comes from abusing and humiliating its central female characters as women.
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Huevos: Little Rooster’s Egg-Cellent Adventure (Un Gallo con Muchos Huevos) movie review: a cock and balls story
Bad chicken-and-egg puns and indoctrination into animal cruelty as just good fun for everyone involved (including the animals). You know, for kids.
The Mermaid (Mei ren yu) movie review: the biggest movie on the planet you haven’t heard of
A wacky fantasy lark, half screwball comedy, half Looney Tunes. Chinese audiences have thrown half a billion dollars at it. Prepare for Hollywood imitators.
The Divergent Series: Allegiant movie review: walled in by reality
A disappointing downfall from the previous films, the appealing metaphor for nonconformity giving way to dull good-vs-evil battle and dumb plot conundrums.
Grimsby (aka The Brothers Grimsby) movie review: grim indeed
A soul-crushing experience: lazy, cheap, lurid, and stupid. Painfully unfunny and pointless. Sacha Baron Cohen now panders to those he once rightly mocked.
The Boy and the Beast movie rating: yellow light
A few instances of gorgeous and magical imagery cannot make up for the lack of genuine emotion or a fresh story. Strictly for devoted anime fans.
London Has Fallen movie review: agitprop security theater
A Nuremberg rally for 21st-century America. Pure terror porn: racist, jingoistic, thoroughly obnoxious. Donald Trump voters will love it. *sob*
Pride and Prejudice and Zombies movie review: ironically, it has no brains
A Mr. Collins of a movie: fatuous, self-important, and nowhere near as smart or as elegant as it thinks it is. There isn’t a lick of wit to be found here.
The Finest Hours movie review: that sinking feeling
See this for Casey Affleck: he exudes a classic cinematic masculinity here. Alas, the rest of the film is old-fashioned in ways that are downright stodgy.
Triple 9 movie review: ordinary criminals
How did a genre-smashing director make a heist thriller so generic, with characters too unlikable to be engaging but not twisted enough to be intriguing?
