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maryann johanson | #BlackLivesMatter

opening wide today: ‘10,000 B.C.,’ ‘College Road Trip,’ ‘The Bank Job’

10,000 B.C.
The guy who brought us aliens blowing up the White House in Independence Day now brings us cavemen chasing down woolly mammoths across the plains of the last ice age. I hear hunting the beasts is easier when the UFOs round them up for you. (my review)

College Road Trip
Martin Lawrence takes his daughter on a car trip to college. I know — it sounds like a horror story, the idea of Lawrence as anyone’s dad, but here’s the really scary thing: the college-age daughter is Raven-Symoné, who was once Billy Cosby’s annoyingly adorable kid on The Cosby Show. Yes, you’re old. (are you kidding me? I’m Martin Lawrence’d out after Welcome Home Roscoe Jenkins, so I’m skipping this one)

The Bank Job
It’s the possibly-true inside story of one of the most legendary heists in British history. When thieves wipe out a London safe deposit vault, among their haul are photos that are being used to blackmail a member of the royal family. Can you say “patsies?” I knew you could. (my review)

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