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die hard is a xmas movie | by maryann johanson

“the New Zealand Prime Minister publicly denies being a lizard person”

Exactly what you’d expect a lizard person to say. From io9:

New Zealand Prime Minister John Key was recently asked to provide “any evidence to disprove the theory that [he] is in fact a David Icke style shapeshifting reptilian alien ushering humanity towards enslavement.” Key, in a congenial manner atypical of shapeshifting reptilian aliens, responded.

Said Key:

“To the best of my knowledge, no. I’ve taken the unusual step of not only seeing a doctor but a vet, and both have confirmed I’m not a reptile … I’ve never been in a spaceship, never been in outer space, and my tongue’s not overly long either.”

But how do we know the doctor and the vet aren’t lizard people, too?

We are not fooled, reptilian overlords. We are not fooled.


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