because nothing evokes the spirit of the Christmas Baby Jesus like hate mail

I get a lot of hate mail, but this is extra special. My movies-for-the-resistance rundown of lessons from Schindler’s List on the occasion of its 25th anniversary generated this lovely missive:

Merry Christmas baby Jesus hate mail

Merry Christmas baby Jesus hate mail

Merry Christmas

We “enjoyed” your “Schindler’s List” piece right up until the end of it.

YOU, darling, are a toxic feminist and you and yours can be disrupted as you will see.

Cheers!

Sandra & Judy

This was sent by snail mail to Salt Lake City Weekly, which ran a shorter version of the essay I posted here. (The idea for this essay was actually proposed to me by SLWC’s arts and entertainment editor, Scott Renshaw.) So I presume that this is what Sandra & Judy took exception to:

• We cannot rely on the beneficence of rich white men to save the rest of us. Of course, we must celebrate Schindler’s campaign of resistance, and indeed it forces us to wonder where the likes of him are now — men using their wealth and privilege for the betterment of all. George Soros and Bill Gates are only two dudes. Yet, we must never depend on the whims of rich white men for anything. No individual should wield such power. It’s no way to run a planet.

I can only assume that Sandra & Judy are two rich white men complaining under pseudonyms.

Still, ya gotta love the insouciance of pairing a not-at-all-veiled threat — I’ll be “disrupted”? — with a sweet little sleeping Christmas baby Jesus surrounded by cute fluffy animals. I feel prayed for.

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Bluejay
Bluejay
Sun, Jan 27, 2019 11:54pm

Is this an actionable threat? Hope you’re okay.

MaryAnn Johanson
reply to  Bluejay
Mon, Jan 28, 2019 10:56am

I’m fine. Somehow I doubt that Sandra & Judy will be traveling to London to disrupt me.

LaSargenta
LaSargenta
Mon, Jan 28, 2019 12:02am

In honor of their choice of card, JEEZUS ONNA HOCKEY PUCK!

In some ways, this is incoherent. Or maybe it is that it reads like they didn’t understand what you wrote and I just acan’t see what they see, so it makes no sense to me. But, it feels like a threat, as no one needs to tell you.

I am so sorry. Anything specific we can do to help?

MaryAnn Johanson
reply to  LaSargenta
Mon, Jan 28, 2019 10:58am

It makes no sense to me either. I honestly don’t understand what their beef is, unless they genuinely are two rich white men. But they could counter my complaint by simply using a lot of their money for noble, planet- and humanity-benefitting causes!

Thanks for the offer of help, but I’m not sure there’s anything to be done.

Danielm80
Danielm80
reply to  MaryAnn Johanson
Mon, Jan 28, 2019 11:54am

I’m guessing they were upset by the section about toxic masculinity.

Speaking of which, I thought this article was interesting:

https://www.nytimes.com/2019/01/26/opinion/sunday/fraternity-sexual-assault-college.html

Tonio Kruger
Tonio Kruger
reply to  Danielm80
Mon, Jan 28, 2019 4:53pm

Yes, MaryAnn, you obviously hit a nerve. Which, come to think of it, is what good writers — and especially journalists — are supposed to do.

The late Harlan Ellison did it. The late Molly Ivins did it. Now you are carrying on that tradition.

I’m not sure how much it helps to think of it in that way but it couldn’t hurt.

LaSargenta
LaSargenta
reply to  MaryAnn Johanson
Mon, Jan 28, 2019 4:57pm

I don’t suppose they put a return address on that envelope?

MaryAnn Johanson
reply to  LaSargenta
Tue, Jan 29, 2019 11:32am

I didn’t see the envelope, but I doubt it.