For months now, I’ve been the spoilsport on Twitter telling everyone that no, their most eagerly awaiting movie — whether it’s Wonder Woman 1984 or Black Widow or No Time to Die or A Quiet Place 2 or whatever — will not be opening anytime soon; no, not even on their new pushed-back release dates. So far, I have been vindicated. At the moment, however, as we barrel down on their current release dates, Mulan and Tenet are still playing chicken with the damn coronavirus, still insisting that they will be opening in July. Though Warner Bros. did give in and move Tenet from July 17th to July 31st.
(ETA: Mulan debuted on Disney+ in September.) (ETA again: Here’s my review of Wonder Woman 1984… which I didn’t see until after it debuted on Christmas Day, 2020, on HBO Max.) (ETA once more: Here’s my review of Tenet, which I finally got to see during the end-of-year awards season, after it had debuted on demand.) (ETA again: I posted a review of A Quiet Place: Part II after it became the first film I saw in a cinema for 14 months, in May 2021.) (ETA once more: I reviewed Black Widow when it debuted in cinemas and simultaneously on Disney+ in July 2021.) (Another ETA: I reviewed No Time to Die when it finally opened in autumn 2021.)
I really hope Christopher Nolan — who is reportedly insisting that Tenet open in July, while Warner Bros. would prefer to delay further — can step back from envisioning himself as the savior of cinema and start thinking about the safety of his fans. While the coronavirus is still running rampant around the US (and to a lesser degree the UK), it is a bad idea to entice people back to multiplexes, given how little understanding there seems to be among the public of just how dangerous COVID-19 is. Does Nolan want to kill moviegoers?
Look: Movies are my religion. I think movies are tremendously important as entertainment and as culture. I miss going to the movies… which I did more than most people, obviously, because it’s my job. But even I don’t think that movies are worth risking my life.
Anyway, with the prospect of movies heading back to cinemas again, I’ve had to consider what I will do if that happens too soon. Which seems to be in the offing. And in the process of thinking about it, this discussion on Twitter yesterday really angered me:
Some of the replies to this… sheesh. This privileged, blinkered fanboy insistence that arts criticism can be "objective" and that you can parse movies without looking at cultural context is now officially sociopathic. https://t.co/0HlP1w2ZHH
— MaryAnn Johanson (@maryannjohanson) June 17, 2020
And this is what I have decided:
I pledge now that I will not see or review any new movie available only in cinemas, no matter how much I might be eager for it, as long as COVID-19 remains a danger. (Yes, that includes even if I were able to watch new films on screeners at home. Because that option would not be available to ordinary moviegoers.) It would be hugely irresponsible of me to help promote a movie that would put audiences at risk.
If the pandemic had been well managed, it’d still be a scary prospect to get back into theaters… as seems to be the case in New Zealand right now:
So, cinemas in New Zealand are open again at full capacity, and the country is basically #COVID19 free, so people should be confident that it's safe to go to the movies… and almost no one is going. This does not bode well for virus-ridden US/UK. https://t.co/18G1OJMNMX
— MaryAnn Johanson (@maryannjohanson) June 18, 2020
(The Trip to Greece was brand new in NZ cinemas, and not available on demand. And still only a tiny portion of the usual prepandemic moviegoing public could be drawn back to big screens. And, of course, if somehow Americans and Brits suddenly developed the same awareness of the danger that Kiwis seem to have, that would mean that it would be a bad business decision to open any new films.)
But the way that our leaders — on both sides of the Atlantic — have totally abdicated all responsibility and have let the virus burn through our populations… the situation will have to be dramatically improved, somehow, before it feels even remotely like it might be safe to go back to the movies.
This doesn’t mean I’ll stop writing film criticism! There are still plenty of movies, new and classic, that I can write about. But for the time being, I see no ethical way to cover films that will be available only in cinemas.
To be continued…
Thanks for this. My heart goes out to businesses that are failing because of the pandemic, but that doesn’t make it a good idea to encourage people to spend large amounts of time indoors with other people.
I swear, the ONLY reason we’re seeing this push to open businesses is not because it is safe to do so, but because governments want to stop their financial support of businesses and employees that has allowed people to stay home. They’d rather kill their own citizens.
Yup.
Some basic economics – government largesse doesn’t materialize out of the ether – it comes from taxpayers – individuals and the companies they own or work for – i.e. the economic engine that makes a country prosperous. Now this might be an alien concept to anyone who’s never run a profitable, prosperous business.
Not everyone has a lucrative line of graft like senile Gropey Quid Pro Joe and his deadbeat son, (which CNN et al. have no curiosity about). Given the reality that the majority of people have no or relatively mild symptoms and the overall survival rate is close to 100% – for a very long time far more Americans have died from tobacco *every year* than from the Communist China virus – it’s not unreasonable to remind folks that *somebody* has to actually be productive to pay for the leftists to live in la la land.
If you’re determined to feel ire ask international affirmative-action hire Tedros Ghebreyesus, the non-physician who mismanages the WHO – the same guy who named Robert Mugabe a “Goodwill Ambassador” – why he’s happy to be a toady for Communist China and spread their lies.
Or you can “come on down to Chinatown” with Nancy Pelosi – you know, who sat on a pork-laden “stimulus” bill over politics.
Thanks, MaryAnn.
A tough choice to make, but you definitely made the morally correct decision. I visit my father every week and still have to go to work, so even if I didn’t care about my own health and/or the health of other theater goers and their families (which I do), I couldn’t justify going to see a film until a reliable vaccine is widely available and this is somewhat contained.
Thank you for sacrificing views to keep more people healthy. You’ve done a great job reviewing streaming content lately, and luckily, there’s still tons more to watch and/or review. Anyone jonesing for more Harley after BoP should consider signing up for a free trial of DCUniverse to check out the Harley animated series.
It’s a feminist, slightly more juvenile (it gets pretty stupid, but silly comedy is refreshing in these ultra serious times), gratuitously violent Venture Bros, and I kind of love it, so much so that I paid the 8 bucks for a month out of guilt. Fans of BtaS will be amused at its take on classic villains, and Bell and Cuoco make the perfect Ivy and Harles. Bell’s Ivy is a tad Jane Laney for any Daria fans out there.
I’d be happy to sponsor a review of the first few episodes even if, a la Avatar, you don’t really like it, it’d still be fun to read your thoughts. Let me know if there’s any room left on your plate.
Thanks, I’ll keep that in mind.
Actress Catherine Bell is voicing Poison Ivy? Cool!
Better. Lake Bell, who made In a World…
It’s hard to read tone over the internet, so if you were joking, ignore my comment and just watch the series, which is exactly as good as amanohyo says it is.
Actually I was joking but thank you for the info, anyway. For some reason, I suspected Kristen Bell was the actress in question and I was a bit amused that the original post just assumed that she was the only actress with that surname in Hollywood. My bad.
My mind always goes to Kristen Bell. I never watched JAG, so I didn’t get the joke, but I’d watch a TV show starring Lake Bell, Catherine Bell, Kristen Bell, and Laura Bell Bundy, as long as only some of them sing.
You are doing the right thing.
Thank you for this. Throughout all of this I’ve been startled at how pressured I feel to do things that I think are unsafe because others are doing them or just because it’s possible to do them and they’ve been responsibilities in the past. I thought I was stronger than that but clearly I need more support to make the right choices. Your decision makes it easier for others to make the right choices. (Like always! Because your reviews are excellent!)
Good luck with this. I’m a bit surprised that anyone would seriously consider doing the opposite of this decision but then we all know the old cliché about common sense…
Our local theatre is a beautiful new one with the reclining seats. But management— which seems to change every month— refuses to invest in staff, keeping the absolute minimum of sullen, underpaid employees who do the bare minimum of sweeping up spilled popcorn. Even before the virus I stopped going because of the overall atmosphere, let alone the lack of cleanliness.