And the winners are…
A lazy adaptation of the Stephen King novel, manipulatively cheap when it isn’t provoking eye-rolls at its genre banalities. Why can’t someone find the right role for the charismatic Jason Clarke?
Post WWII upheaval is a cheap backdrop to beautiful people getting it on. Characters and situations are undeveloped, and there’s little genuine romance here, and too much laughable preposterousness.
Accidental hilarity turns ugly in this baffling exercise in genre-hopping that thinks it justifies its Hollywood-typical adolescent-boy attitudes about women, sex, violence, and morality. It does not.
The story of a fascinating woman retold in the most reductive, least resonant way possible, while actually sidelining her. Even cast as a simple haunted-house tale, it’s not even a little bit scary.
A spectacular, heart-stopping adventure that has you catching your breath and gasping in shock. See it in IMAX 3D for an enrapturing you-are-there feeling.
I have a terrible feeling of deja vu. I have a terrible feeling of deja vu. I have a terrible feeling of deja vu. I have a terrible feeling of deja vu.
Overly complicated yet somehow anticlimactic, and constructed more with pat Hollywood pomp rather than the authentic grit it demands.
Even among the chimps, there’s just one token female, and she’s defined solely as the sexual partner of a male and as the mother of his children. [This post is not behind the paywall.]
In honor of his highest profile role yet in Dawn of the Planet of the Apes, let us gaze upon the ruggedly handsome Jason Clarke.