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die hard is a xmas movie | by maryann johanson

caption this! image from ‘The Vampire’s Assistant’

New fun for Wednesdays! We look at an image from an upcoming movie and write snarky, witty, or otherwise entertaining captions for it. No prizes, it’s just for fun.

So here’s an early peek at The Vampire’s Assistant (formerly titled Cirque Du Freak), Paul Weitz’s new fantasy adventure starring John C. Reilly:


The synopsis, courtesy of Universal Pictures:

The Vampire’s Assistant tells the frightening tale of a boy who unknowingly breaks a 200-year-old truce between two warring factions of vampires. Pulled into a fantastic life of misunderstood sideshow freaks and grotesque creatures of the night, one teen will vanish from the safety of a boring existence and fulfill his destiny in a place drawn from nightmares.

14-year-old Darren (Chris Massoglia) was like most kids in his suburban neighborhood. He hung out with his best friend, got decent grades and usually stayed out of trouble. But when he and his buddy stumble upon a traveling freak show, things begin to change inside Darren. That’s the exact moment when a vampire named Larten Crepsley (John C. Reilly) turns him into something, well, bloodthirsty.

Visit the film’s IMDB page for more info.

Caption away…



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