It’s Thursday, so it’s time to remake an 80s classic TV show or movie with an all-new cast. This week: The Princess Bride, the 1987 fantasy spoof that’s one of the most quotable flicks of the decade.
(This week’s topic was suggested by my brother Ken, who figured it was the ideal movie for me to play with. If you have a suggestion for an 80s TV show or movie we should recast, feel free to email me.)
The original cast featured:
Westley/Dread Pirate Roberts: Cary Elwes
Buttercup/The Princess Bride: Robin Wright
Prince Humperdinck: Chris Sarandon
Count Rugen: Christopher Guest
Vizzini: Wallace Shawn
Inigo Montoya: Mandy Patinkin
Fezzik: Andre the Giant
The Grandson: Fred Savage
The Grandfather/Narrator: Peter Falk
The Impressive Clergyman: Peter Cook
The Albino: Mel Smith
Miracle Max: Billy Crystal
Valerie: Carol Kane
I don’t have suggestions for everyone, but here are a few of my picks for a new cast:
Buttercup/The Princess Bride: Scarlett Johansson
Count Rugen: Daniel Craig
Fezzik: Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson
The Albino: Eddie Izzard
Who would you cast?
And the battle of wits has begun!
Orlando Bloomin’ Onion as Wesley.
Meanwhile, this demands some snark-attention.
Inigo Montoya: Antonio Banderas (admittedly an obvious choice)
The Grandfather: Robert DeNiro
Miracle Max: Joe Pesci
Valerie: Doris Roberts
Okay, I’ll continue
Buttercup: Lindsay Lohan (don’t laugh)
Count Rugen: Tim Roth
Prince Humperdinck: Leonardo DiCaprio
Vizzini: Wayne Knight
The Impressive Clergyman: John Travolta
Yellin: Ron Livingston
Vizzini: Vince Vaughn
Miracle Max: Samuel L. Jackson
Valerie: Alfre Woodard
I’ve been working on this, basically since I suggested it:
Wesley: Milo Ventimiglia
Inigo Montoya: Devid Tennant (okay, so he’s not Spanish. But neither is Mandy Pantinkin. Tennant can do the combination of drama and comedy required)
Fezzik: Shaquille O’Neal
Buttercup: Sophia Myles
Rugen: Alan Rickman
Humperdink: Tom Cruise
Vizzini: Jack Black
Miracle Max: Jon Stewart
The Albino: Nick Frost
Impressive Clergyman: Michael Palin
Grandfather/Grandson/Valerie/King: I got nothin’
I am recanting my original post; Orlando Bloom would make a great Inigo Montoya. He even has the hair for it.
Rugen: Alan Rickman
I think what I’m really hoping to see here is Alan Rickman as Snape as Rugen:
“Good heavens… are you still trying to win?”
It would fun/painful to find a part for Shatner
Westley/Dread Pirate Roberts: Paul Bettany
Buttercup/The Princess Bride: Keira Knightley
Prince Humperdinck: Hugh Grant
Count Rugen: Robert Downey, Jr.
Vizzini: Paul Giamatti
Inigo Montoya: Don Cheadle
Fezzik: Michael Clark Duncan
The Grandson: Fred Savage
The Grandfather/Narrator: Martin Sheen
The Impressive Clergyman: Michael Palin. Good call.
The Albino: Nick Frost. Again, good call.
Miracle Max: Jim Carrey
*melts*
Really? David Tennant? I don’t know if that would work out the way everyone’s dreaming. I thought Wesley, for sure.
“Really? David Tennant? I don’t know if that would work out the way everyone’s dreaming. I thought Wesley, for sure.”
oh, yes, really! Westley is great, but Inigo is just so memorable a character — besides, Westley is probably only in his early 20s .. whereas Inigo has been seeking revenge for 20 years…
oh hell, i confess — i’d see David Tennant in *anything* as *anything*…
Of mild interest to this topic.
Some excellent suggestions here. My favorites so far:
Westley: Orlando Bloom (capacity to look geeky, vs Milo Ventimiglia, who can’t)
Buttercup: Keira Knightley
Fezzik: Michael Clark Duncan
Vizzini: Jack Black
Grandfather: Robert deNiro (or, actually, why not Peter Falk again, he’s still grandfather-capable)
But then, can we consider Naveen Andrews from “Lost” for Inigo Montoya? I have no idea whether he can swashbuckle, or look any way but deadly serious, but for looks alone he’s perfect. And how about:
Miracle Max: Kevin Bacon
Valerie: Kyra Sedgwick
The Impressive Clergyman: Christopher Eccleston or John Malkovich
You guys are SO missing the obvious:
Buttercup: Amy Adams
Hank, you’re onto something there. Amy Adams for sure.
Wesley: ?
Princess Buttercup: Evan Rachel Wood
Prince Humperdink: James Franco
hello?
Westley/Dread Pirate Roberts: LEONARDO DICAPRIO
Buttercup/The Princess Bride: BRYCE DALLAS HOWARD
Prince Humperdinck: JAMES FRANCO
Count Rugen: EDDIE IZZARD
Vizzini: PAUL GIAMANTE
Inigo Montoya: ANTONIO BANDERAS
Fezzik: MICHAEL CLARK DUNCAN
The Grandson: FRANKIE MUNIZ
The Grandfather/Narrator: ANTHONY HOPKINS
The Impressive Clergyman: ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER
The Albino: DAVID CROSS
Miracle Max: GILBERT GOTTFRIED
Valerie: BETTE MIDLER
Westley/Dread Pirate Roberts: Channing Tatum
Buttercup/The Princess Bride: Amanda Seyfried
Prince Humperdinck: Justin Timberlake
Count Rugen: Daniel Craig
Vizzini: Simon Peg
Inigo Montoya: John Leguizamo
Fezzik: CGI giant voiced by James Earl Jones
The Grandson: Daveigh Chase
The Grandfather/Narrator: Harvey Kietel
The Albino: Nick Frost
Miracle Max: Zach Galifianakis
Valerie: Amy Poehler
this took me bout 15 to 20 mins , so no I did not over think this.
WESTLEY: Ryan Reynolds
BUTTERCUP: Keira Knightley
PRINCE HUMPERDINK:Cary Elwes
COUNT RUGON:Hugh Laurie
VIZZINI:Jason Alexander
INIGO: Enrique Iglesias
FEZZIK: The Big Show (WWE)
GRANDFATHER: Robert De Niro
GRANDSON:Jonathan Morgan Heit
THE ALBINO: Dan Fogler
THE IMPRESSIVE CLERGYMAN: Steve Martin
MIRACLE MAX: David Spade
VALERIE: Rachel Dratch