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FlickFilosopher.com

film criticism by maryann johanson | celebrating 25 years: 1997–2022

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Terminator

Terminator: Dark Fate movie review: it’s back… and we don’t know why

Wed, Oct 30, 2019
no comments yet

Fight the future. Change the future. Watch the future reset itself so that everything ends up much the same way anyway. Repeat. This time-travelling franchise is, ironically, stuck in the past.

| Leave a comment

Alita: Battle Angel movie review: ‘Rollerblade Runner’ with a Strong Female Character(TM)

Wed, Feb 13, 2019
2 comments

Devoid of personality and soul, this hellish Frankenstein monster of processed entertainment product wallows in a stew of borrowed ideas and imagery and does absolutely nothing fresh with them.

| 2 Comments

Mortal Engines movie review: it’s got no rev

Thu, Dec 13, 2018
no comments yet

Like the book it’s based on, the worldbuilding is intriguing, but the characters and story are strictly cliché. A lazy, confused, and derivative disaster, with plot points and visual and thematic motifs shamelessly stolen from far better movies.

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Justice League movie review: grab ’em by the fanboy

Fri, Nov 17, 2017
76 comments

The cinematic equivalent of Trump and Brexit as awfulness brought upon ourselves. Incoherent and cheap-looking. There are no heroes, and everything is broken.

| 76 Comments

Terminator 2: Judgment Day 3D movie review: he said he’d be back…

Tue, Aug 29, 2017
2 comments

An action masterpiece newly remastered in gorgeous 4K (and rejiggered for superfluous 3D) reveals how fresh it remains not only technically but thematically.

| 2 Comments

Terminator Genisys movie review: back from the future… again

Thu, Jul 02, 2015
22 comments

I have a terrible feeling of deja vu. I have a terrible feeling of deja vu. I have a terrible feeling of deja vu. I have a terrible feeling of deja vu.

| 22 Comments

Hot Tub Time Machine 2 movie review: time to say goodbye

Thu, Apr 09, 2015
8 comments

Not so much a movie as a mismatched mix of dick jokes and rampant homophobia. I’m kidding: There aren’t any actual jokes here.

| 8 Comments

Project Almanac movie review: temporal d’oh!

Fri, Feb 27, 2015
7 comments

There are things in which horny teenaged boys were not meant to meddle. Like we needed the warning.

| 7 Comments

The Expendables 3 movie review: like you care what I think

Tue, Aug 12, 2014
42 comments

In the vast conspiracy of stupidity that has overtaken pop culture, the disparagement of this movie by a film critic becomes an endorsement of a sad sort.

| 42 Comments

X-Men: Days of Future Past movie review: time for hope

Mon, May 19, 2014
44 comments

With its time-twisting plot, sci-fi soapiness, powerful humanism, and to-die-for cast, this is the summer blockbuster done with elegance and heart.

| 44 Comments
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