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maryann johanson, not crying

wtf: AOL is still in the dialup business?

Here I am, merrily getting back up to speed with the whole living-on-the-Net, blogging-in-my-jammies thing after a wee break while bronxbee visited me in London, when I am shocked — shocked, I tell you — to discover something, well, shocking, via Business Insider:

LEAKED: Internal Reports Reveal The Truth About Patch Traffic

Right now, all that investors value in AOL is its declining, but still revenue-rich dial-up business.

AOL CEO Tim Armstrong’s grand turnaround plan is to take the dial-up revenues and invest them in new businesses.

And then it goes on to talk about Huffington Post and Patch, but I’m absolutely gobsmacked — perhaps my favorite new bit of English slang that hasn’t quite got an equivalent in American slang for the sheer WTFness of it — to learn that AOL still has a

revenue-rich dial-up business

I know the U.S. is behind in broadband usage compared to most of the rest of the postindustrial world, but… wow.

People are still accessing the Internet on dialup. In the United States. A lot of people.

I feel like I’ve just discovered that folk are still using buttonhooks to secure their shoes to their feet.

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