This week’s question is inspired by a comment by reader Danielm80 (in response to last week’s question):
How would you cast The Muppets’ Princess Bride?
In the tradition of all Muppets movies, one major character must be played by a human, with the rest of the cast filled out by Muppets. (Other humans may make cameo appearances.) I’ve illustrated this post with an image of Miss Piggy in a wedding dress (designed by Vivienne Westwood for the 2014 movie Muppets Most Wanted, per Vogue) purely for aesthetic purposes: I think Buttercup, as the straight woman of the story, should probably be the one character played by a human.
I think I might cast Gonzo as Westley. And I’ll leave the rest to you. (Of course, feel free to dispute my choices here!)
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I like your notion of a human for Buttercup.
Fezzik kinda HAS to be Sweetums, right? But I’d go wildly against type for his compatriots:
With the human casting, there’s no female lead role for Miss Piggy – but it would be insane to leave your biggest star out of the picture! So I’d cast Miss Piggy as Iniga Montoya!
And for Vizzini (as you’ve never seen him before!) the one, the only, Fozzie Bear!
Kermit’s a classic male lead, so I’d still go with him for Westley, I think.
I’m kinda stumped on the villains, though. Uncle Deadly is best suited for villain roles, but I don’t think he fits these villains. Maybe give Lew Zealand a chance to exercise his acting chops as Humperdinck?
Fozzie as Miracle Max. Sam the Eagle as Vizzini (his “Inconceivable!” and “Morons!” would be perfect). The Swedish Chef as the Distinguished Clergyman. Kermit — the ringleader, the head storyteller — as the Grandfather. And as the critical audience surrogate, in a role reimagined for two, Statler and Waldorf as the Grandsons.
With an updated soundtrack by the Electric Mayhem!
Oh boy, what fun! Agree on the human Buttercup.
Westley: Kermit
Inigo: Gonzo
Fezzik: Fozzie Bear
Vizzini: Rizzo the Rat
Count Rugen: Miss Piggy
Humberdinck: Sam Eagle
Impressive Clergyman: Swedish Chef
Man with Albinism: Crazy Harry
Miracle Max & Valerie: Statler & Waldorf
Ancient Booer: Animal
Grandson: Scooter
Grandpa: Rowlf
Perfect!
It’s fun to think about how different Muppets can put their spin on a role. I think Sam the Eagle would be hilarious in any number of parts.
I don’t want Miss Piggy to die, though!
I think Miss Piggy would be great as Humperdinck. And then we’d have two Princess Brides.
Brilliant. Then when Kermit as Westley tells her, “It’s possible, pig,” he’s just being literal.
You might have to rewrite the “miserable vomitous mass” bit, though — too cruel? Misogynistic? Misspiggyistic?