Take Me Home Tonight (review)

Happy Labor Day 1988? What the…? Hey, I love Duran Duran, too, but 80s nostalgia as a thing is so ten years ago… just about the time that the 33-year-old Topher Grace would have been the right age to play the just-out-of-college, I-dunno-what-to-do-with-myself whiner he plays in this distasteful, predictable attempt to outdo Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, or remake American Graffiti, or maybe just be as Superbad as it wanna be. Grace’s (Predators) Matt is supposed to be a brilliant MIT grad, but he appears to have no interest in anything whatsoever, except perhaps getting with the girl of his high-school dreams, Tori (the bland, blond Teresa Palmer: The Sorcerer’s Apprentice), who’s suddenly back in town. Over the course of a single night, several parties, and more than one life-threatening escapade, he will steal an expensive car with his best friend (Dan Fogler [Mars Needs Moms], desperately unappealing and, at 35 years of age, desperately miscast as a 22-year-old), lie to Tori about working as an investment banker (instead of the Suncoast Video outlet he actually toils at), and then be absolutely stunned when she’s furious to discover he’s lied about it all. Behold the assumed privilege of the milquetoasty Nice Guy, who never understands what an asshole he is… and behold how Grace — who, as cowriter and producer as well as star, deserves to take much of the blame here — expects us to feel sorry for his Matt. Michael Biehn (Planet Terror) as Matt’s dad? There’s some good 80s nostalgia right there. More of that, please. Less of the rest, for the rest of eternity.

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